


The Heart Remains The Same

by heartsdesire456



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, College, F/M, Future Fic, M/M, MTF!Stiles, Major Character Injury, No Character Death, Transgender
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-27
Updated: 2013-07-27
Packaged: 2017-12-21 11:35:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 28,797
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/899828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heartsdesire456/pseuds/heartsdesire456
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Stiles left for college, he already knew the truth... Stiles wasn't a 'he' at all.  Dropped into a new, exciting, liberating level of freedom that came with going to college somewhere without anyone who knew her, Stiles began to explore her true self and began her quest to become the girl she knew she had always been. Her fears of everyone's reactions back home led to skipping the first holiday... and then a second. And then the next. </p><p>Two and a half years after leaving Beacon Hills - two and a half years spent living an entire new life as a trans!woman - a call in the night forces Stiles to go back to Beacon Hills to face the people she had left and the friends she had abandoned.</p><p> </p><p>  <i>“Stiles… it’s your dad.”</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	The Heart Remains The Same

**Author's Note:**

> Soooo what the hell, right? 
> 
> Basically, some twitter people were talking Trans!Stiles and I was struck with the idea that even Stiles as a girl would still be STILES and I wanted to explore that. 
> 
> Sorry if it doesn't live up to your expectations!!!
> 
> Edit: Soooo AlphaFeels did trans!stiles art for this! <3 [here](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1688984)

From an early age, Stiles had a felt a little uncomfortable in his skin. He never really could get a read on what felt ‘wrong’ as a child. He liked the same things the other kids in his class liked, he played the same games, liked the same movies, wore the same clothes… he just never felt _right_. When he was diagnosed with ADHD when he was ten, he figured it was just that antsy feeling and it would go away when he was medicated. 

It didn’t.

However, Stiles was distracted from wondering why he didn’t feel right when tragedy struck. His mother being diagnosed with cancer when he was twelve took up most of his free ‘contemplation’ time. Fears and confusion and anger at no one in particular took up a large part of his life. Even growing closer to Scott and his mother since his mom and dad needed someone to look after him while his mother went through treatments took up a large part of his life. For two years he was lost as he sat by and watched his mother deteriorate slowly until one day she was gone. 

For months after his mother’s death, Stiles was under so much pressure to take care of his dad and let his dad take care of him that he honestly couldn’t remember the first half of his freshman year of high school. There was so much going on he could only remember the bad parts – like his father’s drinking getting frighteningly heavy for a bit – and the rest was just flashes and blurs in his memory.

It was about the time he stated his sophomore year that Stiles started to notice something was different about him again. Particularly two somethings. He caught himself thinking things like ‘the other girls’ and not knowing where that even had come from. He’d catch himself almost correcting a teacher calling him ‘Mr. Stilinski’ and barely stop from going ‘that’s miss’. He was completely thrown at first, until he began to realize it was far from the first time he’d thought of himself as such. He would remember times as a child when he sat down to play with the other little girls in class only to feel really confused when they told him ‘no boys allowed’.

The second thing Stiles noticed was that his eyes were lingering just as much on other guys in gym class as on the girls. For the longest, he accepted that maybe he might possibly like boys. He still liked girls, but boys caught his eye as well. He contributed his confusion over thinking of himself as a girl to his possible bisexuality. He figured maybe his mind was having trouble translating ‘likes boys’ and instead spat out ‘is a girl’. He and Scott decided to join the track team and, subsequently, ended up trying out for lacrosse together. Stiles hoped that playing a more violent, ‘manly’ sport might straighten things out in his brain, even if he was pretty sure ‘straight’ was far from what he was.

And then Scott got bit by a freaking _werewolf_.

The next two years of Stiles’s life were fraught with werewolves, kanimas, hunters, psychotic alpha packs, friends dying, people killing each other, and every other form of murder and mayhem one could imagine. It was pretty damn distracting, if Stiles was honest. 

All the death and destruction and lies was almost as distracting as Derek Hale and his constant states of undress when Stiles least needed even more of a reason to question his sexuality. It was actually Derek Hale that made Stiles give up questioning and just accept ‘yeah, I like dudes’. Derek’s brooding, grumpy demeanor was hard to get used to at first, but it was never hard to look at him, even if he was angry and sort of terrifying. Eventually, though, he began to calm down and warm up to Stiles and oh how _that_ made things harder ( _ha!_ ) for Stiles to ignore. Because Derek wasn’t just attractive, oh no, that would’ve been easier to deal with. Instead, Derek had actually become a pretty loyal friend once things calmed down.

It was somewhere in Stiles’s senior year that he really began to understand two things:

First, he was almost certainly more than a little bit in love with Derek. Not just attraction, not the obsession he’d had for Lydia, but the kind of love that made him want to spend hours just hanging out with Derek and laughing and joking and watching movies and playing video games… just spending time together. He wanted to be with Derek in a way that scared him. It scared him even more to think that even if there was a possibility Derek could grow to feel the same about him, he was leaving for college so there wasn’t really any likelihood it would be soon. He knew the reality of it and it didn’t look good. If he got the guts to start something before he left, he could meet someone at college and ruin his friendship with Derek for something that wouldn’t last. If he didn’t try to start something, chances were Derek wouldn’t still be single four years later. In the end, he chose to do nothing because having Derek in his life was more important than anything else, no matter how he was there.

The second thing he realized was that his lifetime of confusing moments had a purpose. He was bored one night and came across a documentary on transgender individuals. At first he found it kind of interesting… until one of the girls started describing her experience growing up a little boy. It was _exactly_ like what Stiles had felt. It wasn’t as strong, he’d never felt for sure that he was ‘wrong’ or that his body was ‘wrong’, but the things she said felt so real to him that he couldn’t stop there. After the documentary ended, he went into research mode. He went through so much information for two weeks that, by the end of it, he was almost ready to accept that he was possibly a ‘she’.

Stiles tried to ignore it. He was happy with his body, he was happy with his life, and he didn’t want any extreme upheavals to ruin that. He had a little more time before college and he wanted to enjoy it, not rock the boat and risk messing up his relationships with his father and friends. The problem was that, now that he had really thought about it, his internal dialogue shifted to _her_ thoughts, her dreams, her thoughts, her _life_.

Stiles didn’t say anything. Stiles never corrected anyone. But by the time Stiles graduated high school, there was no doubt left in _her_ mind.

Stiles was a girl. 

Because of her grades, Stiles had been accepted to schools all over the country. Scott and Isaac were both staying in Beacon Hills and going to a small college one town over – Scott to study nursing and Isaac trying his luck at psychology of all things – but Stiles was going to Berkeley to get a teaching degree. It had surprised almost everyone when she expressed an interest in teaching, but her father knew she liked kids so it made sense she’d want to work with them. They all knew she could’ve got a degree at the same school Scott and Isaac were going to, but they also understood that Berkeley was close enough she could come visit them frequently and it was worth the distance for a degree from _Berkeley_.

What Stiles didn’t count on, however, was what the overwhelming freedom of _absolutely nobody knowing her_ would do for her true identity. Stiles had lucked out with a single room, so nobody was around to see when Stiles, on a whim, went shopping the first week of classes and bought some clothes from the women’s section. She still didn’t feel very ‘girly’, so she went with jeans and tee-shirts, but she also bought some makeup. It took tons of YouTube tutorials and hours of practice, but Stiles finally was happy with the way her makeup looked. 

It was a similar flight of spontaneity, after seeing what all sorts of people went to the classes she was in, that saw Stiles wearing one of her fitted tee-shirts and tight jeans and makeup to class. Absolutely nobody seemed to care. Stiles felt emboldened by the lack of reactions in the diverse student population and went shopping again. She bought a bra with thickly padded cups and some gel ‘enhancer’ inserts to put in the cups to keep them from collapsing in as well as several pairs of girls’ underwear – nothing frilly and lacy, she still did NOT see the appeal of itchy lace – and started to wear almost nothing but her girl clothes. She had let her hair grow out some in her senior year, so when it started to get too long she decided not to cut it. Instead, she bought some bobby pins to pin her bangs back on top of her head and just let her hair keep growing.

When Stiles started to meet people, obviously they could tell she wasn’t physically a girl, but none of them seemed inclined to argue when she corrected their pronouns from ‘he’ to ‘she’. She didn’t make friends fast, she was actually worried she wouldn’t make any after several weeks without a single ‘friend’, but that changed when she dropped her books outside one of her lecture halls and a girl with a buzz cut stopped to help her. She introduced herself as Charlie and then didn’t even try to be subtle when she flat out asked, “So, are you trans?”

Stiles had never really said it openly, so she was struck for a moment, but nodded, smiling slightly when she said, for the first time ever out loud, “Yes, I’m a transwoman.”

Charlie told Stiles that she’d seen her around campus and just couldn’t help her curiosity. She asked Stiles if she had started just started therapy, since Stiles still seemed pretty masculine, and, when Stiles admitted she hadn’t been brave enough to seek a doctor out yet, Charlie was able to give her the number of one of her own friends’ therapist. After that, Stiles not only started hanging out with Charlie pretty regularly, but also met several of Charlie’s friends.

Stiles also began to see Dr. Connors, a specialist at a local transgender support clinic, about whether or not she could start hormone therapy. Dr. Connors gave Stiles a three-month timeline of things she needed to do before he would okay her for hormone replacement therapy. It included talking to other transgender individuals at a support group, speaking to a few people who considered themselves neither male or female and chose to do nothing physical to change themselves and were perfectly happy, and to speak to psychiatrist to be sure it was what she wanted to do. 

Charlie was with Stiles through the entire process. Stiles felt bad making excuses to not come home to her dad and Scott, but Stiles wanted to be sure of her choice before she went home. She did, however, tell Scott about Charlie. At first, Scott sounded sort of jealous, but as Charlie and Stiles grew closer and Stiles’s feelings for Charlie began to change, Scott started to encourage Stiles to go for it. 

So she did.

It was strange in the best way that Stiles felt comfortable in her body and that Charlie felt comfortable with a girl with a male body when their relationship turned sexual. Stiles knew it had to be the weirdest thing ever for a transgender eighteen year old girl who still had a completely male body to start her first ever sexual relationship with a girl who considered herself a lesbian, but Charlie was pretty much the most important person to Stiles in her journey towards finding herself. It was all due to Charlie that she had found her way towards a medical transition at all.

Stiles’s therapist deemed her ready to start hormone replacement therapy just in time for thanksgiving break and Stiles was terrified. She couldn’t go home. She couldn’t show up the way she was, but she knew she couldn’t spend a whole week living as a boy again. It was the hardest choice calls he had made in years, but when she told her dad that she just couldn’t get home yet, he took it with a level of understanding that Stiles hoped persisted.

Over the next two years of never going home a single time, her excuses became less accepted with understanding and more expected and taken with a heavy heart.

~

Stiles was asleep when, at three in the morning, Charlie came in and flipped on the light. “Stiles! Stiles you’ve gotta get up!” she said in a rush and Stiles groaned, rolling over. After a pretty great eight month relationship, Charlie and Stiles had both known to call it quits. They both knew there was no future there, but they were able to stay friends and eventually got an apartment off campus together. They had been living that way for the past year.

“Charlie, I hate you,” Stiles grumbled, voice hoarse with sleep. She yelped when Charlie tore the covers off the bed. “CHARLIE!” Stiles yelped, only to quickly lower her voice when she saw the phone. “What’s wrong?” she asked, then grabbed her cellphone from Charlie’s hand. “Hello?”

There was a silence and Charlie mouthed ‘Scott’, but Stiles knew that a moment later when he started with the words that Stiles _never_ wanted to hear. “Stiles… it’s your dad.”

Within ten minutes of Scott explaining his dad had been attacked by a rogue omega passing through their territory, Stiles was packing a bag and getting ready to head to Beacon Hills for the first time since she left. It was only when she was shoving her makeup bag into her bag that she froze. “Scott… is he conscious?” she asked suddenly.

“Well, yeah, why? You wanna talk to him?” Scott asked and Stiles sighed, looking up at Charlie, who just came over and took Stiles’s hand as she sat heavily on the bed.

“If he has a shock… is it going to make him worse?” she asked.

“Shouldn’t, but what’s the shock?” Scott asked. “Wait, you didn’t like… join a cult or something right? Or is it a tattoo? Jesus I haven’t seen you in so long I can’t imagine what you’d look like with a tattoo.”

Stiles cringed. “Just put him on, okay?”

There was a moment while the phone was being handed over and then Stiles’s heart leapt in relief when she heard her dad’s voice strong and steady. “Hey, Kid, I’m fine,” he said, and Stiles’s shoulders dropped their tension.

“Thank God,” she said, glancing at Charlie. Charlie didn’t know, so she hoped her dad understood her ‘coded’ message. “I’m so glad the guy who mugged you didn’t do a better job.”

“Ah, Charlie?” John asked, and then chuckled. “I’m fine, kid. You don’t have to leave in the night like this-“

“The hell I don’t! Scott says you’re going to need help for a while,” Stiles argued. “But look… Dad…” She took a breath. “There’s something you need to know before- before I show up. I don’t want it to be too much of a shock, okay?”

John made a soft noise. “I figured there was something, Stiles. I haven’t seen your face in two years,” he said softly and Stiles felt a pang of guilt.

“I know, Dad, and there’s- there’s no easy way to say this so I’ve avoided and I shouldn’t have but- but I’m going to come home and take care of you no matter how you react so- so here it goes.” Charlie hugged Stiles from behind and Stiles closed her eyes. “Dad… I’m a girl.”

John laughed, and Stiles’s heart dropped. “Stiles, c’mon, that’s not right, pranking your old man in the hospital-“

“It’s not a prank,” Stiles said in a tight tone. “Dad, I’m transgender. I’m- I’ve been living as a woman pretty much since I started school,” he explained. “I know I should’ve told you before and I’m _sorry_ but it’s- it was scary and it was so much easier to just make up reasons to stay away and I’m so sorry but I needed it.”

There was a long silence before John spoke. “Stiles… Jesus you’re- you’re serious?” John asked, sounding overwhelmed. “Stiles you- you never said-“ He sighed and Stiles’s heart dropped. “We’ll talk more when you’re here, okay?”

Stiles swallowed hard. “Alright, Dad. I’ll- I’ll be there by tonight,” she whispered. “Love you Dad, be good for the nurses, okay?”

“Love you too, Stiles,” John said, then hung up with a click. Stiles closed her eyes and fought back the lump in her throat before nodding.

“Okay. Okay. I’ve gotta go,” she said, clapping Charlie on the leg before standing. “Duty calls.”

“You gonna be okay?” Charlie asked, and Stiles nodded, smiling.

“I’ll be fine.”

~

It felt weird driving into Beacon Hills after so long away from home. Almost everything was the same. There were a few new stores or old stores closed on the main street, but for the most part, it was almost like she’d never left. When she got to the hospital, she almost panicked when she realized that she was about to potentially see people that she had known before. She was actually going to see her dad. She would possibly see Mrs. McCall. Worse yet, she might see _Scott_. Stiles really hoped she didn’t run into Scott or his mother before she got to talk with her dad. She didn’t want to talk to anyone before her dad.

As she walked through the hospital, she kept her head down, wishing she had worn her hair down so she could get away without anyone seeing her face too clearly. She knew her dad’s room number, so she didn’t have to ask at the desk. When she got there, she was happy to find the room empty. If nothing else, she’d made it there without being spotted. When she walked in and saw her dad’s pale, sallow face her heart clenched. “Dad?” she said weakly, catching his attention.

John looked from the TV he had been watching to her, and then froze. She bit her lip, hands in her jacket pockets nervously. She watched his face as he looked her over, and then met her eyes. She bit back a watery smile, only to let it out when he let out a relieved sigh. “Stiles,” he said in a rough voice and Stiles laughed, rushing over to the bed.

She carefully leaned over the bed, hugging him careful of his bandages. “I’m so glad you’re okay,” she laughed out through her tears. She pulled back and looked at the bandages over his arms and chest. “Jesus, Dad, you’re really messed up,” she realized and he shook his head.

“I’ll be fine,” he said, staring at her still. She blinked away tears and pulled her sleeves over her hand to wipe them off her face. “God… I don’t know what to say.” He reached up and touched her face, looking at her. “You really are Stiles,” he said and she nodded, biting her lip nervously.

“I’m Stiles,” she said, and he nodded uneasily. “Look, I know it’s a lot to take in and- and I should’ve told you but I didn’t know if- if it would be okay or not and I’m so sorry,” she rambled.

John smiled sadly. “Nope, rambling Stiles, that’s the real one in there.” He shook his head. “Stiles, how did- wait, do you even go by Stiles?”

Stiles nodded. “Yeah, Charlie suggested Stella, but I’m not-“ She made a face. “I’m still me. I’m not somebody else. I’m still Stiles.”

John just looked her over. “God, you look even more like your mother,” he said, and Stiles laughed.

“I know! I realized that when I started wearing makeup.” She waved a hand. “Obviously I’m not wearing any now, but I look like her with makeup.” She looked down at her hands. “I’m sorry I lied, Dad, but I was just scared. I didn’t-“ She cringed. “I couldn’t lose you. It was easier to just lie instead of risk you hating me or something. And after I started wearing makeup and girl clothes, I couldn’t- I couldn’t handle going back to being a boy.”

John looked like he’d been slapped when she looked up again. He reached out and grabbed her hand, squeezing it. “Stiles… I would never _hate you_ ,” he said in horror. “Stiles, nothing – and I mean _nothing_ \- would make me stop loving you.” He shook his head. “It’s- it’s weird. It’s so strange. I’m half convinced it’s the meds, and it’ll take so much explaining before I understand anything that’s happening right now, but nothing would ever stop me loving you.”

Stiles let out a broken sound and leaned over the bed again, careful to hug her dad around his injuries as she cried into his neck. “I love you, Dad,” she sobbed, shaking as she fought to stay standing. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you. I missed you so much, oh my _God_ I wanted to come home all the time and I’m so sorry I lied. I’m sorry I lied about everything. I missed you so much it hurt-“

John smiled sadly and raised his hand, curling his fingers around her neck. “It’s okay, Stiles. Everything is okay,” he soothed, whispering until her babbling stopped and her tears started to go quiet. It wasn’t easy to accept, it wasn’t easy to understand, he _didn’t_ understand, even.

But he was telling the truth when he said nothing would make him not love his child and he hadn’t seen said child in _two years_. There would be time for talking later. Right now all he wanted to do was hug his kid.

~

Stiles was complaining about her dad’s clear lapse in diet when she’d see his blood pressure when the nurse came by to take it when Melissa came in. “John, has Stiles-“ She stopped when she spotted Stiles. “You’re back!” she said, and then froze when she looked closer. “Stiles…”

Stiles bit her lip and stood up, fully exposing her changed body. In the nearly two years she’d been on hormones, her thighs had shaped up, and her hips had gained some padding. She had always had a slightly curved waist and a pretty round ass, but the hormones had given her a more feminine body. She’d also grown enough as far as breasts that she just wore padded bras, not bras with gel inserts. She didn’t have a curvy body, she still looked more ‘boyish’ than ‘womanly’, but it was enough for her. She wore girls’ jeans and girls’ shirts, but she preferred jeans and tee-shirts more than anything. She owned one dress and had never really worn it. Charlie called her ‘butch’ all the time, but Stiles didn’t care. She was the same as she was as a boy, she was just _right_ now. 

Melissa was still staring when John cleared his throat. “I was surprised too, believe me,” he said and Melissa snapped out of it. 

“Wow you’re… um… a girl?” she asked, and Stiles nodded sheepishly.

“Yeah,” she said, and Melissa sounded surprised at Stiles’s voice. Stiles had worked hard to train his voice to be more feminine, so he could imagine it was a surprise. “I’m- I’m transgender,” she explained with a small shrug. “It’s a shock, I know, but- but yeah. Stiles,” she said, waving awkwardly.

Melissa seemed to realize she was staring, then smiled and walked over. “It’s good to see you, honey,” she said, and Stiles deflated when Melissa didn’t hesitate to hug her. “God, we’ve missed you,” she said and Stiles laughed when they pulled apart.

“I’ve missed everybody, too,” she said, then gestured to herself. “I just… well you can probably paint the picture yourself.”

Melissa just nodded. “I can imagine,” she said, then turned to John. “So Scott called and said Derek’s taken care of the ‘problem’,” she said and John sighed, but nodded.

Stiles jumped suddenly. “Wait, I didn’t even ask!” She looked between them. “How long have you known, Dad? You never said you knew,” she accused.

John shrugged. “A few months. Not too long.”

Melissa scoffed. “And he only found out because my child is an idiot,” she said and Stiles laughed. “Scott and Isaac were fighting and things got all claws and teeth and John happened to be on his way over to give me a ride to work since my car was in the shop. They fell through the freaking kitchen door into the hallway fully wolfed out right in front of him,” she said, shaking her head.

John snorted. “I nearly shot them, they got lucky,” he said and Stiles grinned.

“That doesn’t surprise me at all. Scott never was the brightest crayon,” she said, then snickered. “How did Derek take it?” she asked and Melissa waved a hand.

“He wasn’t too bothered. He just made them go home and sent them both on patrols the next few nights.” She smiled. “It made Peter and Cora happy to not have to go.”

Stiles made a face. “Ew, Peter’s still alive? How has nobody killed him in the last two years? Scott never mentioned him so I hoped he’d died.”

John chuckled. “He’s not that bad. Kinda creepy, but no worse than Derek.”

Stiles huffed. “He wanted to turn me into a werewolf while he was evil and then after he got zombie undead risen he kept trying to talk Derek into biting me. The amount of ‘let’s make Stiles a werewolf’ that he had in his mind was terrifying.”

Melissa smiled. “He’s not so bad since he and Chris started seeing each other. Much more ‘normal human being’.”

Stiles frowned. “Peter’s got a girlfriend? Ew!”

Melissa smirked. “No, Chris as in-“

“ARGENT?!” Stiles squawked, miming barfing. “Ewwwwwww I have to go kill myself. Oh God. Oh no, drugs, all of the drugs!” she cried, collapsing back into her chair, kicking and shaking her head. “Oh God, I can’t live like this!”

Melissa rolled her eyes and looked at John. “Yep, definitely still Stiles,” she said, and John smiled fondly at his _daughter_.

“Yeah, that’s Stiles alright,” he said, smiling back at Melissa when she reached out and patted his hand supportively.

~

Stiles didn’t like what she was about to do at all, but she knew it had to be done and she preferred it not be done around her injured father. As she drove up the driveway to the Hale house, she couldn’t help but smile when she thought about all the times she’d made the same trip in the very same jeep. Two years felt like forever and not long at all in that way. When she stopped, she was shocked at what the house looked like rebuilt. It was _big_. It looked like she imagined it must’ve looked long ago. It was painted a cheerful white with blue shutters and a red door. Derek’s car was parked out front, beside three others, and she cringed, wishing she could talk to just Isaac.

She had just killed the engine when the door opened and Scott flew down the steps. “STILES!” he shouted, running towards the jeep. 

Stiles hopped out, smiling widely as she saw her best friend for the first time in two years. Her smile fell, however, when Scott stopped abruptly and just _stared_ , obviously sniffing her scent. Her heart stopped when Scott actually took a step _away from her_. “Scott?” she asked weakly, and Scott just tilted his head.

“What- I don’t- I’m confused,” he said slowly.

Stiles pushed her hood back and Scott’s jaw dropped. Her hair was still pretty short, so she’d just pulled it into two stubby pigtails that morning, only putting on a little bit of mascara as far as makeup. She started to walk closer and Scott just shook his head. “Scott… it’s- it’s me,” she said weakly.

Scott shook his head suspiciously. “You- you’re not Stiles. Is this- am I dreaming?”

Stiles bit her lip, walking closer. “I’m Stiles.” She looked him in the eyes. “You know it’s me,” she urged. “I know it’s a shock, but you know I’m me. I should’ve told you a long time ago, I know, but I swear, it’s still me.”

Scott just shook his head, looking alarmed. “Stiles wouldn’t go away and come back a _girl_. That shit doesn’t happen, dude. Unless there were witches… OH GOD WERE THERE WITCHES?!” he cried in alarm.

Stiles just bit her lip, trying not to cry. “Scott… I’m- how can you think I’m not me? I know I should’ve told you that I was a girl a long time ago. My dad too. But how can you think I’m _a fake_?” she whispered. She shook her head slowly. “You’ve known me since the second grade, Scott. I understand it’s a shock but- but how can you think I’m _not_ me?”

Scott just stared, pale and silent. He started to say something, then shook his head and turned and walked away without a word. Stiles stared, her heart _breaking_ as she watched the closest thing to a brother she had ever had or would ever have walk away from her. She felt like she’d been kicked in the stomach. He was almost to the porch when the door flew open and an excited laugh came, quickly followed by Isaac running down the steps.

“Stiles!” he cried, only to slow to a stop when Scott passed him, head down, and kept going. Isaac looked up and frowned, glancing back at Scott before whirling back around suddenly, eyes wide. “Stiles?!” He walked across the yard and stopped, staring at her. “Holy- are you- is-“ He looked at Scott, who was walking into the house, then back. “Oh,” he said suddenly.

Stiles wiped at her face, forcing a teary smile. “Hey Isaac,” she said and Isaac just tilted his head. “C’mon, not like you’ve never seen a girl before,” she said weakly, though her lips trembled as she fought to keep her smile.

Isaac just frowned. “You didn’t tell him?” he asked, and she shook her head.

“I should have. I know but- but I didn’t tell my dad either. Until I got the call, I mean. I told my dad on the phone so he wouldn’t freak out when I got here yesterday.” She shrugged. “It’s why I haven’t been home. I didn’t know how to- how to tell anybody.”

Isaac just scratched at his neck. “You’re… I just don’t get it.”

Stiles sniffled. “I’m transgender. I always knew something wasn’t right and then- then when I got to Berkeley I started dressing like a girl and- and living like one. Then I started working towards being one and- and now I’m a girl like I should be.” She blinked and another tear slipped down her cheek. “Scott said- he said I wasn’t Stiles.”

Isaac cringed. “Crap.” He looked at her, than back at the house. “Look… I should go- you know,” he nodded and Stiles just waved absently when Isaac turned and rushed up to the house after Scott.

As soon as the door shut, Stiles stumbled back to her jeep and fumbled with the door handle, unable to see it clearly with tears blurring her eyes, before giving in and leaning against the side, shoulders heaving as she cried, banging her palm against the jeep angrily. “Damn it, damn it, DAMN IT!” she sobbed, unable to believe how terribly wrong that had gone.

“Stiles?”

Stiles gasped and spun around, shocked at the voice right behind her. Derek was standing not very far back, looking more than a little dazed. “Derek,” she breathed, wiping at her face. “God, sneak much?” she grumbled.

Derek opened his mouth, and then snapped it shut, looking up at the house, then back. “Are- are you… okay?”

Stiles snorted, rolling her eyes. “Yeah, everything’s freaking _rad_ , dude,” she grumbled, turning back to open the door.

“Stiles, wait,” Derek said, closing in to put his hand on the door to stop her. He looked down at her, and then shook his head. “How long?” he asked softly.

She shrugged, sniffling. “When I was little I knew something wasn’t right. Then for a while I kinda didn’t have time to think about much besides my mom- Then I thought I was just feeling wrong because I’m bisexual, then there was all the death and werewolves and murder and stuff…” She shrugged. “Sometime around eighteen? When I started college I just… decided to buy the clothes and try it. And it just escalated and by spring semester I was on hormones and officially in a lesbian relationship,” she said softly. 

Derek nodded. “So that’s why you stayed gone?” he asked and she looked up at the harsh tone in his voice.

“I ‘stayed gone’ because I didn’t know how the hell to explain to my family and friends that ‘guess what! I’m actually a girl!’,” she said tersely. “And obviously I would’ve been better to stay gone,” she said, jerking her head at the house.

Derek rolled his eyes. “Come on, it’s a shock. Give them time to process-“

“My dad and Scott’s mom both just stared for a minute and then welcomed me with open arms,” she argued. “My dad only messed up and called me ‘son’ twice before he started introducing me to his doctors and nurses as ‘my daughter’. Scott’s mom only called me ‘he’ once before getting it right. One day and they’re both already accepting and trying to get used to it and Scott _refused to believe I’m Stiles_!” she snapped. “There’s shock and then there’s _denial_.” She bit her lip. “He- he turned and walked away, Derek. He didn’t even look at me, he just left.” 

Derek smiled sadly. “Stiles, who would you feel if he kept something so big from you all this time-“

“I’d at least TRY to understand!” Stiles cried angrily. “He’s my _brother_! I have put up with way more than a freaking _sex change_ from him over all these years.” She covered her face. “I _know_ , okay? I know it’s huge. It’s a giant deal. I know I lied for years. I know all of it and I sprung it on him, at least my dad heard it over the phone before he saw me but- but it’s _me and Scott_!” She laughed a broken little laugh. “I got boobs and hips and he can’t look at me. He got fucking _fangs and claws and weird sideburn things_ and I just rolled with it.”

Derek actually laughed. “Well when you put it that way…” 

“Damn right I’m putting it that way,” Stiles said matter-of-factly. “My boobs can’t kill people, so I’d say I’m damn well lower on the scale of ‘thinks to freak about’!”

Derek stared for a second before smiling a wide, _real_ smile. One that made something insides of Stiles jerk sharply, stealing her breath in a way that she hadn’t felt in over two years. “Yep, you’re still Stiles,” he said, then nodded at the house. “C’mon inside. Look at the house at least?” he asked.

Stiles swallowed hard, fighting the wave of ‘ _oh shit_!’ that was threatening her, and then nodded. “Yeah I’d like that,” she said, turning back to the jeep’s side mirror to wipe off the mascara smudges on her cheeks before turning back to follow Derek up to the house.

When they walked inside, Stiles worried he’d run into Scott and Isaac, but who he ran into instead was worse. “Well, well, well, I do believe Mr. Stilinski has joined-“ Peter came into the hall and paused, raising an eyebrow. “Or Miss Stilinski,” he corrected, raising an eyebrow. “Why Stiles, you matured rather unexpectedly,” he said with a creepy little smirk.

Stiles shuddered. “Just when I thought my day couldn’t get any worse.” Derek snickered.

“Wait, Stiles is back? Is that why Scott was running around-“ Stiles gaped in horror when _Chris Argent_ walked up behind Peter and rested a hand on his shoulder. “Well now,” he said, eyes wide as he looked at Stiles.

Stiles made a face then turned to Derek. “I was wrong, my day can always get way worse,” she said, covering her eyes and whimpering. 

“Now, now, that’s rude,” Peter said in a too-smooth tone that just spelled out ‘creepy leer’ even without looking. “Well, Derek, that would explain why he- excuse me, _she_ hadn’t come home in the past few years.”

Derek huffed. “Leave her alone,” he muttered, turning to Stiles. “So, want to look around still, or have you reached your quota of reactions today?” he asked with an apologetic shrug.

Stiles took a breath and forced a smile. “I’m okay, now show me the place,” she said, letting Derek lead the way to the left.

“We figured one big room for living room and meeting space would work better,” Derek explained, showing Stiles a big, open room that housed a living room near the front and what looked like an office space near the back. He lowered his voice. “Don’t worry, Chris just showed up to pick Peter up, they were already leaving sometime in the next few minutes,” he mumbled and Stiles grinned.

“Please tell me I’m not the only one who is absolutely freaked out by that development,” she whispered and Derek rolled his eyes.

“Allison and Scott nearly lost their minds.” He smirked. “Granted, that may have more to do with them coming home from the movies and walking in on them having a candlelit dinner,” he said and Stiles barked out a laugh.

“Scott never mentioned!” She smiled sadly. “He never mentioned a lot about the pack, though,” she admitted. “We talked about you sometimes, and Scott talks about Isaac a lot, but that’s about it, really.”

Derek walked through a door and through the laundry room – slash – mudroom and opened a glass-paned door to the kitchen. “Scott mentioned you a lot while you were gone,” he said and Stiles’s stomach twisted painfully. “So,” he said, clearing his throat. “Kitchen,” he said, waving hand. “And through there,” he pointed at the open doorway to the right. “Dining room in the front of the house. There’s a bathroom under the stairs, but all the bedrooms are upstairs,” he explained. He looked down, scuffing his toes. “You sort of have a room,” he admitted and Stiles’s breath stopped. Derek looked awkwardly down at his feet. “We thought… Scott thought you would be home. During breaks. Maybe for the summers,” he all but whispered. “He insisted we keep a room for you. Even if you lived with your dad, you would need somewhere to sleep on pack nights.

Stiles bit back a swell of guilt and looked down at her hands. “So… who all lives here? Officially?”

Derek scratched at a spot on the counter behind him. “Mostly just me and Cora.” He looked up. “Peter was, but he spends more time at Argent’s apartment. Pretty sure he spends maybe one night every few weeks here.”

Stiles gave him a sad glance. “You haven’t got anybody new? Scott never mentioned anybody but… it’s really just Scott, Isaac, Cora, and Peter?”

Derek shrugged. “I didn’t do so well the first time around. Figured we’d wait and see what happens.” He smiled. “Allison bought the loft from me and redecorated it. When she’s off from school she and Scott live there. I figure it’s only a matter of time before they make things official and maybe contribute a few pups to the pack.”

Stiles made a face. “Oh God, Scott as a dad. That’s terrifying,” she said and Derek chuckled. “What about Isaac and Cora. They have anybody they might end up giving you more pups with?”

Derek huffed. “Cora better not get married anytime soon. She’s too young-“

“She’s almost a year older than Scott,” Stiles pointed out. She smiled. “I can’t imagine Isaac married with kids either.” 

Derek made a face. “I don’t know who Isaac spends his time with and I really don’t want to know. But let’s just say I’m not sure Isaac’s making pups with anybody,” he said and Stiles laughed.

“Shut up, really?” She grinned, nodding. “I can see that. He always did seem to have a crush on Scott for a little while there.” She sighed, looking at the refrigerator and the photos taped to it. Photos of the pack and of Allison and Scott. “It really doesn’t feel like that long ago, but I’ve missed so much,” she said softly.

Derek looked at her closely. “Why did you stay away?” he asked tightly. “I mean, I understand… finding yourself,” he offered more magnanimously than anyone else had so far. “But Stiles, you just… disappeared,” he said softly. “You were _pack_. Scott and Isaac were already so alone and you just left.”

Stiles looked up, throat tight. “Trust me, Derek, I know.” She bit her lip and looked down. “It was just… it was easier to not come home than to try and explain. Especially before I got through the first few changes. It was so hard to handle the thought of you guys freaking out.” She laughed wetly. “Look at Scott. And you know me, I didn’t tell my dad about werewolves for over two years,” she pointed out, gesturing. “I don’t do well with painful truths. It’s easier to just keep hiding.”

Derek nodded. “So it was easier to abandon your pack than be honest?” he asked a bit harshly and Stiles gaped at him. Derek rolled his eyes, looking away. “Come on, you know I didn’t- okay it was harsh but-“

“True,” Stiles said sadly. She looked up. “I know.” She nodded and swallowed. “It was just so different. Nobody cared. Nobody looked at me like a freak. I was living in one of the most open and freeing cities in the world and I just- I felt so comfortable and I didn’t want to face life outside that happy bubble.” She gestured to herself. “I left Beacon Hills as a boy and I came home a girl. How do you explain that?”

Derek walked to the refrigerator and took out two cans of soda and nodded to the bar stools. “How about you try?” he asked, sitting a can in front of one of the stools. “I’ve got to cook dinner, but I can still listen.”

Stiles grinned, going to hop onto the stood. “Derek Hale _listening_? My God I’ve missed the apocalypse!” She couldn’t even begin to ignore what his unamused eye roll did to her even after two years. “If you want to know, I can try to explain,” she said and Derek nodded, going to open the cabinets to get out pots and pans.

“Well, you can start with how you never seemed even slightly ‘uncomfortable’ with being a teenage boy,” Derek prompted. “I figure you would’ve had depression issues and such if you decided to transition that fast.”

Stiles nodded. “Well, actually I probably could’ve been okay staying a boy,” she admitted and Derek looked surprised as he started the stove. “My group and my therapist were actually reluctant to classify me so quickly because I told them that. I would’ve felt wrong, like I did for a long time, but I was dealing with it well enough.”

Derek hummed. “When did you start feeling ‘wrong’?” he asked curiously.

“As long as I can remember,” she answered. “It was never anything big because I always liked the same things other boys did and I felt fine just being me, but I’d think things like ‘the other girls’ or I’d feel left out when there was a ‘no girls allowed’ or ‘no boys allowed’ war at the play table. I just never felt quite right like that.” She picked at the tab on her drink. “Then my mom being sick took my mind off things. Then I realized after she died that I liked boys and girls, so I just assumed that was why it had felt ‘wrong’. I thought ‘oh, I’m bisexual, that’s okay’ and I was fine for a while. Then you happened and all the werewolf stuff and trying not to die played a big part of distracting me.” She blew out a breath. “So I _knew_ deep down for as long as I can remember, but I accepted that I might be a girl somewhere in my senior year. Then after I saw this documentary about transgender people, I really understood that was totally what I was going through.” She shrugged. “I started wearing girl clothes and asking people to call me ‘she’ and ‘her’ pretty much from the start at Berkeley.”

Derek made an interested noise. “New School, New You, huh?” Stiles nodded. “Can I- if I ask things will you talk about them?”

Stiles narrowed her eyes. “Depends what you want to ask.”

Derek turned and walked over, letting something simmer on the stove as he leaned on the counter across from her, opening his own drink. “Why stick with ‘Stiles’? Why not get a ‘girl’s name?”

Stiles shrugged innocently. “I’m Stiles. I’m still me down to the core. That was one of the reasons my doctor made me see a therapist to confirm my gender dysphoria, I was still such a _dude_.” She chuckled. “Charlie calls me ‘butch’. I don’t wear skirts and dresses and heels and stuff. I like makeup because it makes me look more like a girl and less like a teen boy, but I still wear tee-shirts and jeans. I just wear girls’ tee-shirts and jeans. Think of any of the thousands of girls who aren’t as ‘girly’ and I’m just one of them.” She smirked. “I spent eight months in a lesbian relationship, clearly I’m not your average girl,” she joked.

Derek looked amused. “A lesbian, huh?” he asked and she shook her head.

“Nah, I like boys, but it was only really Charlie,” she said awkwardly. “I didn’t… I didn’t feel comfortable having to explain why I wore makeup and girl clothes but Charlie was my friend and things kinda just happened. I haven’t tried with anybody else. We lasted a while but it was just more like friends who fucked, no feelings other than friendship, so we called it off and became roommates,” she explained. “And since I can pass now, I don’t want to risk the wrong kind of reaction.” She cringed. “I heard about that stuff in group. No thank you.” She shrugged. “I’m fine single. I’m happy with who I am too much to risk all this progress just to get my ass beat and end up disfigured or possibly dead.”

Derek gave her a slightly uneasy look. “If I ask what all you’ve had done will you hate me?” he asked and she raised an eyebrow.

“Why are you so curious yet calm about this?”

Derek snorted. “I lived in Brooklyn and worked in Manhattan for years. Let’s just say the ‘small town mindset’ the others have isn’t a problem for me. If you can imagine it, I’ve seen it.” He shrugged. “I can deal with this well enough. You’re home, just a little different looking.” 

Stiles smirked, though her insides were tied into knots. “Derek Hale, did you just admit you missed me?”

Derek huffed and muttered as if it was outrageous, but Stiles saw his cheeks showing spots of color. “I just got used to you so it got quiet,” he defended in a gruff tone.

Stiles grinned. “Sure you did,” she said, then waved a hand. “Electrolysis, Adam’s apple shaved down, and hormone therapy. That’s all I could afford.”

Derek nodded. “Are you going to try and get the… rest-“ He made a face. “Soon or is that a ‘wait for it’ thing?”

Stiles hesitated. “Charlie asks me that a lot but honestly… I’m okay,” she said and Derek looked surprised. She rolled her eyes. “Look, I have a little bit of a chest, but mostly this is padding,” she said, gesturing to her boobs. “I’m actually pretty sure it’s better than I can just wear a tank top around home without having to wear a bra. If I get implants, I’m not getting big ones anyways, so I’m not sure I want to.” She cleared her throat and gestured downwards. “And I’m not getting the other.”

Derek raised an eyebrow. “Really? You’re okay with… not going full-female?”

Stiles nodded with an absent wave. “Honestly, I’m not totally in hatred of having a penis. I was pretty comfortable with my body before. My gender dysphoria wasn’t so strong as to include complete disgust at my body. And it would probably be nice to have everything in the right order, but the surgery is risky, it’s expensive, and if something goes wrong I could end up with some serious problems.” She shook her head. “Anybody I date is going to be fully aware who I am and what’s under my clothes, so I’m not that worried about it as far as other people’s reactions. It’s a painful thing to go through, it’s expensive, and I’m honestly fine with how I am.” She smiled a small yet confident smile. “I like my body as it is. I’ve got enough of a feminine shape, I’ve worked on my voice and my mannerisms, and I finally feel _right_.” She shrugged. “And the hormones still have some work to do. It’s been about two years, so there’s another potential year worth of boob growth and body shaping. I doubt much since I’m too skinny for much fat to transfer, but it’s possible.”

Derek nodded. “Well if you’re happy, that’s what counts, I guess,” he said and she nodded.

“I’d be a lot happier if people all took it as well as you have. My dad did alright and Scott’s mom, but you kinda just rolled with it,” she acknowledged and Derek shrugged.

“I’ve met transgender people before, they haven’t,” he said simply. “It’ll take getting used to – especially your scent being slightly different – but I’ve had experience with more ‘outside the norm’ things than Scott or Isaac or most people around here have.”

Stiles looked down at her drink and bit back a pained sound. “They will come around, won’t they, Derek?” she asked in a small, vulnerable tone.

Derek took a moment before answering. “I’m sure they will, but it may not be as fast as you want it to be,” he said honestly.

Stiles just nodded. “I knew it was too easy. I knew my dad and Scott’s mom were too accepting.” She shook her head. “The other shoe had to drop.”

~

Getting her dad settled in at home on her own was tough, but Stiles managed to help him walk around the first two days without needing help. After that, he was able to walk far enough that he could get to the bathroom by himself and up to his room with only minimal help with the stairs. He was mostly fine, the doctors assured her, but his injuries just spanned so much of his chest that moving around a lot was painful. For a whole week, Stiles didn’t leave the house since Melissa brought over supplies to change his bandages for him since Stiles didn’t like seeing her dad’s injuries. It made her feel guilty and panicky at the same time.

However, her panic found another source soon after. Stiles was in bed, asleep, when she woke up suddenly and didn’t know why. She tried to remember her dream but couldn’t think of anything. She groaned and rolled over to try and go back to sleep, just in time to hear a thud and a snarl. She jumped, sitting up fast, and flipped on her lamp. She turned back only to scream when she saw the window open and a woman outside of it, frozen in confusion as she tried again to dive through the window only to hit an invisible boundary. “Who are you?” Stiles snapped, leaping out of bed, going for the knife still on her bookcase from when she lived at home. When she turned back, the woman was gone.

“DAD!” Stiles cried, rushing to the door. She ran into her father’s room just in time to see his window rattling. He was slowly waking up, only to cry in alarm when the glass shattered. Stiles rushed to the window and, before the woman could even reach in, Stiles slashed at her with the knife, slicing her hand and face. She let out a bloodcurdling scream as the skin burned and bubbled from the wolfs bane laced blade and fell backwards, sliding off the roof.

“Stiles?! Stiles what’s going on?” John demanded, and Stiles just turned around and held up a hand, stopping him from trying to get out of bed.

“Just stay put,” she said, bringing his gun belt from his dresser over to him. “I’ll be right back,” she said, running back to her room. She grabbed the jar of mountain ash dust and rushed back to his room, lining the window sill. She ran downstairs and quickly lined the floor in front of the front door and the back door, hoping that the werewolf wouldn’t try to come through the windows downstairs because she didn’t have enough dust for that.

When she got back upstairs, she got her phone from her room and then went back to her dad’s room. He was sitting in the bed looking intently at the window. She walked over and made a short circle around the bed then flopped down beside him, rubbing a hand over her face. He reached out and ruffled her hair. “So… that ‘random crazy omega’ is looking less likely,” he said and she nodded weakly.

“She tried to come in my room first,” Stiles said, turning to look at her dad. “Are you okay?”

John nodded and waved a hand. “I’m fine, I just had a few heart attacks,” he joked and she laughed. “You gonna call Scott?” he asked and she made a face.

“I’m going to call Derek,” she said, sitting up. 

“Derek, huh? You’ve seen him?” he asked, and she raised an eyebrow.

“Yes… why?” she asked suspiciously. “Why wouldn’t I have?”

He shrugged. “I just didn’t think you had kept in touch. He never mentioned talking to you,” he said and she made a face.

“Well, we didn’t really, but Scott talked about him and talked to him about me. Whatever, the point is, Scott and I aren’t speaking so Derek it is. Besides, he’s the alpha,” she pointed out, and then called him, putting the phone on speaker on her knee. “He’s going to be so pissed, so don’t get offended by anything he says,” she warned. 

“Stiles?” A sleepy voice asked. “Stiles it’s not even five yet, what- shit!” There was a rustling. “Stiles, are you okay? Are you hurt? Is your dad okay? Where are you?” Derek asked in a more lucid tone.

“Derek-“

“I’ll be there in a second, just tell me where you are, I’m on my way-“

“DEREK!” she all but shouted, finally shutting him up. “We’re fine. We’re at home and we’re both fine,” she said, giving her dad a ‘what the hell’ face only to be extremely confused when her dad just smiled at the phone with the weirdest mixture of sadness and amusement.

“What happened?” he asked, and she heard a car door shut.

“Jesus, are you in your car-“ The sound of an engine starting up answered her. “Derek, you can put on clothes, you know? Grab some shoes? It’s not that urgent anymore,” she said, rolling her eyes. “But whatever. So, a female werewolf just tried to get in the house.”

“WHAT?!” Derek roared and Stiles startled at how loud it was from the phone speaker. “Did you get hurt? What happened?”

Stiles yawned tiredly. “I had lined the windowsill with mountain ash since Scott and I aren’t speaking and I didn’t want him coming in my room and starting a fight. I woke up and didn’t know why but then I heard a noise and looked up and she was bouncing off the invisible barrier. I still had that knife you gave me for graduation on my bookcase, so I went to get it, but she bailed so I ran to my dad’s room just as she broke in the glass. I cut her and she freaked and fell off the roof.”

“Are you safe for now?” Derek asked, and Stiles nodded, leaning on the pillows beside her dad, only to remember he couldn’t see.

“Yeah, we’re safe. I lined the doors downstairs and then made a circle around Dad’s bed and I’m sitting on it with him now. So at least for the moment, we’re completely fine.” She heard tires squeal outside and shared a look with her dad. “Derek is that you? Jesus, how fast did you drive?!” she demanded.

John cleared his throat. “If you were doing more than twenty over the limit you can go to jail, Son, just a reminder.”

“Yes, Sir, but at the moment I’m okay with that,” he said and John chuckled softly. “Okay, come let me in,” Derek said and Stiles hopped off the bed, leaving the phone with her dad. When she got downstairs and to the door, she toed the line to break it then unlocked the door, opening it just in time to hear Derek say, “I understand, John.”

Stiles took in Derek’s lack of a shirt and shoes, and then rolled her eyes. “I think you are the master of overreaction,” she said, stepping back to let Derek in. “Come on,” she said, leading the way upstairs. 

Derek followed her to her dad’s room where he stopped in the doorway, looking at the glass Stiles was picking through to get back to the bed. “She really wanted to get in, huh?” he asked in a grave tone.

John nodded. “I’d say.” He sighed. “Derek, it’s them again, isn’t it?”

Stiles’s head jerked up and she frowned. “Wait, what? _Again_?” she asked, looking at them both suspiciously. “Dad?”

John looked to Derek, who shook his head resolutely. “She is not getting involved,” Derek said firmly.

Stiles narrowed her eyes, sliding off the bed again. “I’m not getting involved in what?” she asked, crossing her arms across her chest challengingly.

John chuckled and gave Derek a look. “You know as well as I do Stiles doesn’t back down-“

“She is here to take care of you, nothing else. She isn’t getting into this crap again,” he said resolutely. His jaw clenched and he looked past Stiles at the window. “You got out of this life, Stiles, you’re not going to be dragged back in-“

“Yeah, try again,” Stiles interrupted, shivering as a breeze blew in the window. It was still early spring so her shorts and tank top pajamas weren’t exactly helping with the cool night air.

Derek looked at her, then nodded to the wall, vaguely in the direction of her room. “Go put on some clothes-“

“No, you tell me what the hell you’re hiding from me,” she demanded, glowering. “What happened before that’s happening again?”

Derek hung his head. “Stiles, you’re leaving again in a little while, there is no reason to worry-“

“MY DAD GOT ATTACKED ALREADY!” she shouted, shoving at his chest. “Do you think this is a game?! Derek, my dad got attacked once and now clearly it wasn’t a rogue omega!”

John’s voice interrupted. “Stiles, just calm down-“

“You!” She pointed at him, then mimed zipping her mouth shut. “And you, talk!” she demanded, narrowing her eyes at Derek.

Derek slumped. “Stiles, please,” he said weakly and Stiles heard her dad sigh. She frowned over at the sympathy in her dad’s gaze but ignored it in favor of standing her ground.

“Derek,” she said simply, and he caved, visibly giving in with a toss of his head.

“Fine, if you must know, about two months ago we had a pack of radical werewolves come through and threaten us. Isaac and I got attacked,” he admitted. “Your dad was on duty when someone saw two guys getting attacked by four other people in a deserted parking lot and he showed up. He knew by then about us so we had to tell him they were werewolves,” he explained. “A few days later their alpha came up to me at the gas station and told me what was up. They were werewolf purity extremists and they heard the Hale Pack had rebuilt and when they came to recruit us, they found me and Isaac and knew Isaac wasn’t a born wolf.”

Stiles gaped. “So… a freaking werewolf _Death Eater_ pack?!”

Derek’s lips twitched in amusement, but he just raised an eyebrow. “Basically? Yeah. They’re like the KKK of werewolves. They don’t believe in biting humans or letting them into your pack. Only born werewolves are ‘true werewolves’ to them.” He shook his head. “There’s only me and Peter and neither of us are going to be producing pups with other born wolves since we have no female wolves that wouldn’t be incest to mate with – born or bit - so the Hale pack has no future for ‘pure blood’ werewolves. They knew the Hale name was associated with born wolves in the past and they wanted to recruit. Instead, they wanted to ‘cleanse’ us after finding out about us.”

Stiles nodded, biting her lip. “Okay, so what stopped them then?”

Derek made a face. “Chris still had contacts with other hunters. He managed to find out who was after them and give them a tip about where they could find them. They left town as soon as the hunters arrived. And then only your dad threatening to arrest them all go the hunters to leave again without taking out some of us first, in spite of Chris’s urgings about ‘the code’.”

Stiles ran her hands through her hair, and then looked at her dad. “So you think they’re back?”

John shrugged. “It was just my first thought. Could be someone else deciding to kill us.”

Stiles frowned. “But why you, Dad? Why would they come here if they’re after the pack? Sure, you know, but what does that have to do with it?”

Derek shot Stiles a flat look. “He found out about werewolves and started coming around, he’s pretty much ‘pack’ now. Even if he wasn’t, he sees us enough he smells like us. If it wasn’t an omega, that’s probably why he got attacked in the first place.”

Stiles nodded. “And another one came back tonight to finish the job?”

John cleared his throat. “Can I remind you that she went for Stiles’s room first?” he said, giving Derek a look.

Derek paled, looking at Stiles, then back at John. “ _Shit_ ,” he hissed fearfully.

Stiles frowned. “I don’t get it. I haven’t been here in two years and I’ve been back a week. I’ve seen you once and spoke to you a few times, Derek, other than that I’ve been here for the whole time. What, do they want to get my dad on a closer level?”

Derek shook his head. “If they’re watching, they know you interact with the pack. They may have even heard us talking at some point. If they’re watching me they’ll know that you’re important to m- to my pack.” He grimaced. “Okay, I’ll stay here until morning,” he said, looking at them both. “John, I’ll get Peter to come over and stay with you while Stiles and I go get more mountain ash. We’ll surround the whole house. If we bury it the wind or rain can’t break the circle and you guys will be protected at home.”

John nodded. “That works, but what about otherwise? I’m not going anywhere for another week, and even then it’s only to the doctor, but Stiles will have to go get groceries in that time before she leaves again.”

Derek nodded grimly. “We’ll find a way to deal with that after we get the first thing settled.” He looked at his phone in his hand, and then nodded decisively. “I’ll go check around downstairs. You two get some more sleep. Or at least try,” he said, and then nudged Stiles gently towards the bed. “Stay in the circle with him, okay?”

Stiles rolled her eyes, but nodded. “Whatever you say, buddy,” she said, sliding into the bed beside her dad. “You get the light, yeah?” she said, helping her dad slide back down into a lying position. 

Derek flipped off the light, leaving with a soft reminder of, “Shout if you need me.”

~

Stiles was still half asleep when she shuffled downstairs towards the door. She frowned when Derek answered it before she got to the bottom of the steps. “Rude,” she mumbled sleepily, catching his attention. She pointed a finger. “My house, not yours.” She ducked under his arm and then made a face when she saw who was waiting.

Peter pushed his sunglasses down his nose to take in her rumpled shorts and tank top pajamas, her tangled bedhead, and the lines across her face from her dad’s lumpy pillow. “Well someone failed at the ‘beauty sleep’ last night, Stiles,” he said and she flipped him off wordlessly before ducking right back under Derek’s outstretched arm and leaving them there.

She was just pouring up coffee when he sauntered into the kitchen and she groaned. “Please just go away,” she pleaded.

Peter walked right up to her and she gasped when he leaned around her to get the coffee from the counter, leaning way too close. “Is that any way to talk to a guest?” he said softly with a predatory grin on his face.

Stiles huffed and narrowed her eyes. “Is that anyway to look at a barely dressed girl less than half your age?” she countered, shoving him back. “Besides, aren’t you gay now?” she countered, brushing past him.

Peter chuckled. “I’m just fucking with you, it’s fun to see you squirm,” he said and she glowered over the rim of her mug. He openly looked down at her legs and smirked, then looked straight at her chest. “You sure did fill out well,” he said and she spluttered, and then threw her mug at his head, growling in frustration when he dodged it and laughed.

“Stiles?” John called from the hall. “I heard something crash-“

Stiles turned to walk out, casually punching Peter right in the stomach on the way past, grinning when he grunted in pain. “Oh nothing, just trying to kill Peter,” she said, coming out to see him hobbling along slowly while Derek walked a few steps behind, ready in case he needed help. “Derek, your creepy uncle won’t stop ogling my half-undressed state, can I kill him?”

Derek glowered at Peter when he came out behind Stiles. “Peter-“

“What?! She does look good,” he said, gesturing to Stiles’s long, mostly bared legs.

“Hey!” John and Derek both barked at him in unison.

Stiles smirked. “Don’t worry, I punched him,” she said proudly, walking over to slide an arm under her dad’s to take some of his weight. “I’ll let you shoot him later, Dad,” she said and he glowered at Peter.

Derek walked over and held out his hand. Peter sighed but tossed Derek a set of keys. “This wouldn’t be a problem if you had bothered to get dressed before leaving last night.”

Derek turned to Stiles. “Stiles, can you go get dressed so we can go to Deaton’s?” he asked and she nodded.

“Sure, but are we really leaving my dad with Peter? Is that safe?” she said accusingly as she glared at Peter.

Peter rolled his eyes. “I have absolutely no desire to harm any of you. Can’t you take a joke?”

Stiles just rolled her eyes. “You tried to bite me when I was sixteen, forgive me if I don’t ever trust you,” she said, turning to head upstairs, letting her dad stand on his own again.

~

After an awkwardly non-awkward meeting with Deaton, who didn’t even seem to notice that Stiles suddenly was a new gender his reaction was so subtle, Stiles and Derek spent most of the day digging a small trench around the house and then laying and burying a line of mountain ash. They left a small bit unburied so that Peter could get out, and then once Stiles finished the line, Derek tested it by suddenly grabbing Peter by the collar and throwing him at the line, smirking at Stiles when Peter yelped and bounced off, landing in a heap.

Derek nodded to Stiles and turned to head to his car, starting it up and waiting for Peter to collect himself without a word. When Peter was on his feet, he huffed and turned to Stiles, straightening his jacket and brushing off his pants. “So when are you leaving?” Peter asked and Stiles raised an eyebrow.

“Why do you care?”

Peter’s smile slid off his face and he gave her a serious look. “Because Derek doesn’t need this,” he said in a smooth but somber tone. “He’s finally become the alpha he needs to be and I don’t want to see that ruined.”

Stiles huffed. “Well excuse me, asshole, but a pack of Death Eater werewolves is kind of exactly the thing an alpha has to deal with. I didn’t bring this on, this brought me back,” she pointed out.

Peter tilted his head, and then narrowed his eyes. “You really are that stupid,” he said bluntly and she glared. He shook his head. “Look, you help your father back on his feet and then you leave,” he hissed. “Leave Derek alone, don’t come to the house again, get out of Beacon Hills and never come back.” He nodded to her. “Hopefully this is goodbye, Stiles,” he said, turning on his heels to head to the car where Derek was waiting.

Stiles just turned to head to the house, more confused than annoyed.

~

“But I don’t understand,” Stiles said, pacing her room. “It’s a family emergency. It’s only one more week-“

“I’m sorry, Ms. Stilinski, but you’ve missed six days of three of your classes and seven of the remaining two. Your professors can give you until Monday to get back, but otherwise-“

“My father is _bed ridden_ still for the most part,” Stiles argued. “I have to help him around. There has to be something.”

“I’m sorry, but unless you return Monday, you’re dropped from all your courses,” she said and Stiles fell heavily onto her bed.

She shook and swallowed. “If I’m dropped, what does that mean for my grades?”

“As it’s before midterms, you will suffer no blow to your GPA. You’ll have a WF, not an F, and you will be fine to re-enroll again in the future to make them up.”

Stiles closed her eyes and sighed. “Thank you, Mrs. Charles.” She hung up without another word and stared at the ceiling.

“Bad news?” She jumped and saw her dad in the doorway. He looked at her sympathetically. “Kid I can handle myself-“

“No,” she said, sitting up. “I’ll just go back next semester. It’s fine, I’m not leaving you,” she said, walking to the door. 

He shook his head sadly. “You’re working so hard, Stiles-“

She put her arms around his shoulders and laid her head on his shoulder. “You’re my dad,” she said simply. She pulled back and ruffled his hair with a watery smile. “College can be done again, I can’t get a new dad.” She sniffled and wiped at her cheek. “I’ll be okay. Just- I just hate I worked so hard so far. But it’s good. It’s fine. I’ll have all the notes already for next time,” she said with a waved of her hand. “It will all work out.”

John nodded. “So how long are you here for then? If you’re staying longer than one more week, you probably need some things,” he said nodding at her bag with her clothes in it still sitting on the chair in the corner.

Stiles sighed, putting her face in her hands. “I’ll have to call my doctor and get another few weeks’ worth of my medication prescription faxed to the pharmacy. I need to tell Charlie I won’t be back yet. I can buy some clothes easy,” she said, waving a hand. “I’ll stay a few more weeks, just to be sure you’re really okay.”

John looked down. “You should probably try to stay out of whatever’s going to happen around here, okay?” he said gently. He shook his head. “Don’t go running off after them like the old days.” He nodded at the photo of Stiles and Scott on the desk. “Make up with Scott and then just stay out of it. Don’t go looking for trouble, okay?”

She huffed. “Why is everybody so intent on getting rid of me? I know it was a dick move to stay gone for so long, but _seriously_ -“

“It’s to protect you,” John said simply. “It’s not your fight anymore, Stiles. Nobody wants to see you end up collateral damage.”

She eyed him. “And why is it yours, Dad?” she asked softly. “What happened to get you into this?”

He shrugged. “I’m the Sheriff. Even if nobody else knows, it’s my duty to protect my town and that means to be part of the local werewolf pack too.”

Stiles snorted. “That will never not be weird,” she said simply, turning to grab her phone up. “I’ve gotta make a few calls,” she said and John nodded, shuffling back to his room.

~

After taking care of officially dropping her classes, telling Charlie it would be a while longer, having her prescriptions transferred, and going to buy some more clothes, the last thing left was to talk to Scott. In spite of living together close to their school, Isaac and Scott were at the Hale house a lot so she went there to find him. When she got to the house, she saw his car and hoped for the best. 

Before she could knock when she got to the porch, Peter opened the door with an uninviting look in his eyes. “Stiles. Didn’t think I’d see you here again. Weren’t you leaving?” he asked suspiciously.

Stiles just rolled her eyes. “I’m looking for Scott, not your opinions,” she said, pushing past him. “You know where he’s at?”

Peter nodded at the stairs. “I wouldn’t interrupt though. He and Miss Argent are bickering over the phone about what to buy at the store.”

Stiles made a face. “Yikes.”

“Stiles?” Stiles turned and smiled in greeting as Derek came down the hall that went behind the stairs. “Hey, I didn’t know you were coming over,” he said, and Stiles shrugged.

“Come to find Scott. We need to talk finally. A week and a half and he still isn’t speaking to me so I need to fix this,” she said simply.

Derek nodded and Peter hummed. “Wouldn’t want to leave on a bad note, huh?” he asked her and she gave him a confused look.

“Um… I’m actually around for a few more weeks at least,” she said and he just narrowed his eyes almost threateningly. “Not that it’s your business anyhow, Peter.”

Derek frowned. “Wait, why? Shouldn’t you be getting back-“

“I had to drop out,” she said in a somber tone. “Not forever or anything, but…” She sighed, crossing her arms. “This semester is a wash. They said if I wasn’t back by Monday I got dropped so I just went ahead and dropped.” She shook her head. “Nothing is more important than my dad.”

Peter hummed. “Nice, now how about you run along and we’ll send Scott over later. Urgent pack business, I’m afraid.”

Derek shot Peter a glare. “No it’s not,” he said, then smiled at Stiles. “Actually pack dinner. Want to stick around?” he suggested. “I’m actually about to go start cooking now. Isaac’s cutting things up already.”

Stiles hesitated, but then nodded. “Sure. Dad will be fine for a little while. Can I help?” she asked, and Derek nodded.

“Sure, just no pointy objects,” he said, gesturing for her to walk ahead of him. “I remember how clumsy you are, so the knives aren’t yours to play with,” he teased, earning a dramatic pout.

“No fair,” she said, stomach leaping at the genuine, giant smile that crossed Derek’s face at her antics. She had always loved nothing more than a real, true smile of happiness and amusement on Derek’s face. It made him more beautiful than ever.

~

Scott showed his face when Chris and Allison arrived, but he didn’t say anything to Stiles at all. Stiles ignored him and went about helping Derek and Isaac set the dishes at the table. She was delighted that Isaac was at least trying to get used to Stiles being a girl now. He still accidentally said ‘him’ a few times, but he corrected himself without reminding every time. When Allison arrived, she was as magnanimous as always and didn’t even mention Stiles suddenly being a girl, she simply hugged her in an enthusiastic greeting.

When everybody sat down for dinner, everybody was perfectly civil, even if everybody could feel the tension between Scott and Stiles even if Isaac sat between them. Nothing happened until Chris caught Stiles’s eye and offered her a small smile. “So Stiles, how long are you in town for?” he asked and she shrugged.

“I’m not sure. A few more weeks probably. I was telling Derek earlier that I had to scrap this semester so I could help my dad, so I’m not in a rush anymore,” she answered. “It’s nice to be home again. I really missed it.”

Scott snorted and muttered something that Stiles could only catch part of, but that part was enough, “yeah it sure seemed like you missed home.”

Stiles glared over Isaac but Scott didn’t notice. “As I was saying,” she said, pasting on a smile. “I’ve got some time now to maybe enjoy being home for a little while.”

Peter hummed, leaning his chin on his clasped hands, elbows on the table. “Don’t you want to get back? Sooner rather than later? What about… Charlie, was it?” he suggested and she narrowed her eyes.

Chris just looked between them with a confused tilt to his eyes. “Charlie, is that your boyfriend?” he asked and Stiles shook her head.

“For one, Charlie’s a girl, and second, that ship sailed a long time ago.” She grinned. “We started as friends and then started dating really soon and dated for a while, but it just wasn’t there so we went back to being friends. She’s my roommate now,” she explained. “She’s fine giving me time, as long as I keep up my part of the rent she doesn’t care if I’m there or not,” she joked, waving a hand. 

“Probably glad to get away from the blabbing,” Scott said dismissively, earning a glare from Stiles and a kick under the table as Allison glared at him.

“Scott,” she hissed, and Stiles narrowed her eyes.

“Yeah well you put up with it for thirteen years, so clearly it isn’t always a problem,” she said and Scott grunted.

“And look how that worked out,” he said and Stiles glowered.

“Scott, not now, we can do this later-“

“Ha! Like I’m gonna believe that,” Scott said and Allison glared at him harder.

“Scott, stop-“

“What?! Why should I believe anything he says anymore?” he hissed at Allison.

“She,” Derek corrected, and Stiles rolled her eyes.

“Thank you, Derek,” she said, then shot Scott a look. “Some people just can’t get over their narrow-minded crap-“

Scott scoffed, waving a hand. “Well of course, that’s it, narrow-minded. About him-”

Derek rolled his eyes. “Scott, grow up and stop being difficult. It just takes some tact to deal with her situation-“

“Oh you _would_ defend him, wouldn’t you, Derek?” Scott snapped, and Derek paled.

Peter sighed. “Alright, alright, children, settle down.” 

Scott nodded. “You’re right, not in front of Derek so he can rip out my throat-“

“Well fuck it,” Stiles said, standing up. “We can do this right now, Scott,” she said, then walked away, grabbing Scott by a handful of floppy curls, dragging him helping from his chair.

“STILES! Stop that!” He snatched away and she growled and grabbed two handfuls of his shirt and threw him towards the hall.

“Get the hell outside! We’re not having this conversation in front of everybody!”

“We’re not having this conversation-“

Stiles opened the door, then shoved him out, not caring that he pitched down the steps. “Get up, start your car, and turn up the radio to drown us out,” she demanded.

Scott glared but did as she said. “Fine. Whatever. I don’t know what the hell you want to talk about, it’s clear you’re just going to leave again as soon as you can.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” she asked when he got the radio turned up.

Scott turned on her. “It’s what you do, isn’t it? Fucking _leave_?” he snapped.

She just stared. “Scott, I went to college. You did the same thing-“

“I DIDN’T COME BACK WITH BOOBS!” Scott shouted. “Stiles what the hell?!”

She crossed her arms over her chest. “Scott, I know it’s not easy to understand, but I had to. I _am_ a girl. I’ve always been a girl.”

“You were my brother, Stiles-“

“I was really always your sister,” she said coldly.

Scott tossed his head. “Then why the hell did I just find out now?!” he demanded. “I don’t get that, Stiles! If you’re a girl, why didn’t you tell me?!” he cried. “I’ve trusted you with _everything_! I have told you things nobody else will ever know. You know shit Isaac and Allison won’t _ever_ know!” He gesticulated to the house. “I told you everything. EVERYTHING! And you couldn’t even tell me you were a girl? So instead you just ran away.” He gave Stiles a pained look. “Were you ever going to come home?” 

Stiles felt like she’d been kicked in the stomach. Scott’s face told her everything. The pained, lost, confused look said more than anything. “Scott… I couldn’t-“

“Why the hell not?” he demanded. “Did you _really_ think it matters more to us that you’re the same than _gone_?” he asked angrily. “I’ll admit, I’m shocked, I’m seriously shocked, but I would’ve thought you would _TELL ME_ before it got to the ‘fully passes as a girl’ part!” he snapped. “You never said anything. Not to your dad, or me. You _lied_ just to stay away from us!” he accused. “Why? How could you do that to me, Stiles?” he asked in a pained voice. “How could you run away and never come home and never tell me why?”

Stiles sniffled and looked up with tears in her eyes. “Because I didn’t want to _lose you_ ,” he whimpered, biting her lip. “Scott, I’m _sorry_ ,” she sobbed. “I wanted to come home. I wanted to see you and my dad more than anybody. I wanted- I wanted everything to be okay but I knew it wouldn’t be,” she whispered. She looked up. “All I have is you and Dad. That’s it, Scott.” She shook her head. “It was better to not see you and still have you at least a phone call away than come home and _lose everything_ just because I’m a girl now.” 

Scott looked like she had slapped him. “You- you really thought- you think we would turn our backs-“

“YOU DID!” she sobbed out. “When I got here you looked at me and you _walked away_!”

“I thought you _trusted me_ more than that-“

“I trust you with my life, but I couldn’t trust that you wouldn’t _leave me_ ,” she stressed. “Scott, you’re my brother. You were the only friend I had for most of my life. The _only_ person I could tell everything. I couldn’t lose that,” she whispered tightly. “I wanted to tell you, I wanted you to tell me it was okay because I was so _scared_ ,” she admitted, wiping at her face. “I was so scared because I didn’t know what to do and who to trust and I thought maybe it would be okay but if I got it wrong I would lose you and Dad and that- I couldn’t do that.”

Scott just stared at her. “I turned into a _werewolf_ , Stiles, and you just went with it. How could you think I would turn my back on you for this?”

It was the way he said it, the way he looked at her like it was the simplest truth in the world that _nothing_ could make Scott hate Stiles, that broke something inside of Stiles. _Scott_ ,” she choked out, and before she could blink Scott was hugging her so hard it hurt. She clung to the back of his shirt so hard her fingers cramped and just cried into his shoulder, letting it all out. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” she babbled, but he just shushed her.

“It’s okay, Stiles. It’s all okay,” he said, and she could hear the tears in his voice as well. “It’s all going to be okay.”

~

When Stiles got home, she was more than exhausted in an emotional sense. She’d briefly said goodnight to everyone after she and Scott ended up crying it out sitting on the porch, going over everything they had missed of each other.

She flopped down beside her dad and yawned. “Hey Dad.”

He looked at her and chuckled. “What did you get up to? Running around with the werewolves or something?”

She groaned. “Fighting with Scott and then subsequently making up with a so-not-manly clinging-and-crying session,” she said with a sheepish grin. “But we’re okay now. Probably better than we’ve been since he got bit,” she admitted with a happy little grin. Her smile slid. “I’m just really confused about the things people keep saying to me. It’s like when people think you know something and you really don’t.”

John nodded. “How so?” he asked and she sighed, looking up at the ceiling.

“Peter seemed really eager to get me out of Beacon Hills the other day and then again tonight. Which isn’t that bad, I hate him so I’m glad he hates me, but then after something Scott said tonight, something from his first warning struck me. The first time he gave me some ‘warning’ about how ‘Derek’s finally the alpha he should be’ and somehow that correlated with why I needed to leave again. It’s like he doesn’t want me around _Derek_ ,” she said, snorting. “Yeah, cause I’m a danger to an alpha. Whatever.” She waved a hand. “Then tonight Derek told Scott to have some tact when he started being bitchy and calling me ‘he’ and Scott just looked at him and went ‘well of course you’d defend him’ talking about me, and Derek just got all quiet and it was _weird_.” She sighed heavily. “I don’t know what the hell everybody is talking about and I _hate_ that I seemed to be the only one in the room that didn’t get it going by the way everybody found somewhere else to look besides at Derek.”

John smiled sadly and let out a soft sigh. “Oh Kid, it’s not your fault,” he said, reaching out to grab her shoulder. 

She sat up frowning. “Wait, so there _is_ something I don’t know?!” she asked and he cringed. “Dad!” she cried with an offended huff and he sat up, turning to face her. “What is going _on_?!”

“Stiles…” John shook his head. “Look, just give Derek space, okay? It’s not your fault-“

“No, how about you tell me what ‘It’ is,” she demanded, glaring. “Dad, is he okay? Is something wrong-“

“I think he still loves you, Stiles,” John answered softly.

Stiles froze. Her brain was flashing a big ‘DOES NOT COMPUTE’ and everything stood still. It wasn’t possible. Derek Hale didn’t have any feelings besides annoyance and maybe some trust for Stiles. She couldn’t even imagine what could give her dad the idea that Derek felt that way.

“Dad, Derek doesn’t- dude, he doesn’t even _like_ me!” she said suddenly, spluttering. “What’s- that’s just- it’s crazy!” she laughed weakly. John’s grim smile didn’t face. “Dad, no, really, that’s not even funny.”

John nodded. “You’re right, it’s not.” He scrubbed a hand over his face. “Stiles, Peter is worried because he saw the same thing I did when Derek came running to protect you. He doesn’t want to see Derek lose the stability he finally has-“

“Derek didn’t come running to protect _me_ , he came to protect you!” Stiles argued. “Dad, Derek has never _loved_ me-“

“He told me,” John said simply, cutting of Stiles’s denial. Stiles gaped and John chuckled at her face. “I knew nothing about werewolves. And he wouldn’t even tell me why you and your friends had been hanging out with him all that time, but he came to me a few months after you left,” he said and she just stared. John smiled sadly. “He told me that he knew I didn’t like him, he knew I was going to freak out, but he had to tell me that he was in love with my kid and he wanted me to know ahead of time so I wouldn’t blow up when he told you. He made it clear he wasn’t asking permission to date you, he was telling me out of respect because he didn’t want me to give you a hard time about it if you loved him back like he hoped.” John shook his head with a distant smile. “The boy was terrified of me. He told me that he knew you deserved better, but that not seeing you for two months had put it into perspective for him that he couldn’t deny it any longer.” John looked up. “He was going to tell you over thanksgiving break.” Stiles felt sick as she looked down at her lap. John cringed. 

“When you didn’t come home, I told him it was a busy workload and he told me that was fine, because he’d started remodeling his family home and that way there would be enough done he could take a break and spend more time with you by the time Christmas break came.” John nodded at Stiles. “But you didn’t come home then. I think he held onto hope for a little while, but when you still hadn’t come home by spring break, he just… gave up,” he said sadly. “I didn’t like him, I didn’t want Derek Hale anywhere around you, but I felt bad for the boy. I didn’t know it then but later Melissa mentioned that Derek had been just… depressed. For months. Scott had started bringing Derek to her house when he and Isaac weren’t at school because they were worried about him and she would cook every day just so he would be guilted into eating the food she worked to cook.” John shook his head. “He was a heartbroken mess. It took a good part of the year for him to really come out of it, I think.” 

“Holy shit,” Stiles whispered, and John chuckled.

“Yeah, that’s probably why Peter wants you to get out of town. I thought it would be more than enough time for him to get over you, but there’s no doubting the way he looked at you when he came to protect you,” John said, reaching out to squeeze Stiles’s hand. “They want you to leave to keep him from going into a tailspin. He’s better. He’s probably more of an alpha than he’s ever been. If nothing else, you being around with this hunter pack back is going to stress him out.”

Stiles just put her face in her hands. “Oh my God, I can’t- this can’t be real.”

John just clapped her shoulder. “It’ll be fine, Stiles. You’ll leave, it’ll go back to normal. Just try and do like Peter suggested and don’t go over there more than you have to.”

Stiles shook her head. “I can’t do that, though.” She sighed. “Scott’s problem wasn’t that I’m a girl. It was that I abandoned him rather than trust that he would accept me no matter what.” She looked up. “I’m not staying away anymore. They were my pack. I used to be the one that figured out how they could fight the villain of the month. That’s what I did. I protected my friends because I was _pack_.” She shook her head. “I can’t abandon them again. And with this Death Eater pack, I’ve got to help-“

“Stiles you need to get out of here before you get hurt-“

“Dad,” she said firmly, standing. “This is what I used to do. This is what you didn’t know. I-“ She cringed. “I had been saving their lives since sophomore year. Literally, dad.” She shook her head. “I have to help.”

John’s head dropped and he closed his eyes. “I’m not going to talk you out of it, am I?”

She shook her head. “No,” she said simply, standing without hesitation to head upstairs. It was time to research.

~

It took Stiles forever to find anything useful but when she did, she immediately went to the Hale house to see Derek. Peter answered the door and she rolled her eyes. “What happened to ‘Peter’s rarely here’?” she asked, elbowing past.

Peter huffed out an annoyed sound. “I was visiting my niece and nephew. Do you mind?”

She snorted. “Go right ahead!”

Peter narrowed his eyes. “Scott isn’t here. You know that. So why are you here?”

“I need to see Derek,” she said simply. “I’ve got some information on the Death Eater pack.”

Peter sighed. “Stiles, why are you here? Why are you looking into this?” He gestured to the door. “Why aren’t you going back to San Francisco?”

Stiles stood her ground. “Because once upon a time, Peter, they were my pack too. Most of all, my dad is _my only family_.” She shook her head. “Like it or not, I’ve got the time and you all need me.” 

Peter scoffed. “You just can’t get a clue, can you, Stiles?” he asked, turning to walk away. “Derek, you heard our visitor I presume?” he asked and Stiles followed him to the living room.

Derek looked up from the table in the back corner where he and Cora were looking over a map. “Yeah, but we’re kinda busy so I’ll let you two bicker on,” he said with an annoying little smile, turning back to the map.

Stiles put her hands in her hoodie pockets and walked over. “You’d be interested in knowing they’re right about-“ She leaned over the map and put her finger on an old motel. “There.”

Derek and Cora both looked up at her in shock and she smirked. “I had some time last night.”

Derek just shook his head. “It’s not normal how you know things like this, Stiles. I forgot how fast you find stuff.”

She smiled, though the way she recognized the gleam in his eyes made her insides twist with guilt. “I had a few hours last night.” She pointed to a diner across from the motel. “A waitress here called in an animal sighting. My dad got an update from the station and when I looked into it three people from this neighborhood-“ she pointed to the street on the other side of a forested area behind the motel. “I found reports of large animal sightings. The bad news is, they reported a big dog.” She looked up at Derek. “Chances are someone is a very, _very_ powerful alpha.”

Derek cursed. “Great, so they’re trying to kill us and we’re overpowered. Nice.”

Stiles nodded. “Yep.” She looked at Cora, then back to Derek. “Can we lie and tell them Cora’s pregnant and her boyfriend is another pack’s born wolf? Just to buy some time?”

Derek rolled his eyes. “First off, they would smell that she’s not pregnant. Also there isn’t another pack anywhere near here. The closest large pack of born wolves is in Oregon.”

Cora narrowed her eyes. “Plus, we’ve still got Scott and Isaac who aren’t born so they hate us for that. Then we keep you around. Scott and Peter are involved with what’s left of a legendary family of hunters.” She shot Stiles a look. “We’re practically everything they hate.”

Derek nodded. “We can’t use our last method again either. They came back because they know we ran the hunters out.” 

Stiles nodded. “That’s why they went after my dad,” she said tightly. “He got rid of the hunters so they know he’s with you. They want all of your pack gone and thought they’d start with the weakest link.” She dropped her head to the table, and then stood up again. “Great fun. I had forgotten what it felt like to fear for my dad,” she said, rolling her eyes. “So what can we do?”

Derek leaned on the table, looking at the map. “Well that motel helps us. We know where to find them.”

Stiles looked at some of the books on the bookshelf behind Cora and hesitated. “You know, I haven’t practiced since the last time I got hurt, but I could always resurrect my spark-“

“Absolutely not,” Derek said suddenly. He shook his head. “Last time you tried to fight with magic you almost died,” he said firmly.

Cora shrugged. “Yeah but she could give us a chance,” she said suddenly. “We’re pretty sure there are seven of them,” she said to Stiles. “There’s seven of us if we count our ex-hunter allies,” she said, then looked at him. “And if we can bring some magic to help us we may have a chance-“

“She almost _died_ , Cora,” Derek argued. Stiles knew why Derek was so reluctant. The last time she used magic, against a demonic wood nymph actually, she had invoked magic so strong it made her organs begin to shut down from the overwhelming power of it all. She had woken up three weeks later in the hospital after a coma caused by what the doctors could only imagine was ‘extreme exhaustion and dehydration’ causing organ system failure.’ It had _sucked_ A lot. 

Stiles stood tall and looked at Derek. “It wouldn’t be that much power again. If I could incapacitate the alpha you could handle the betas, right?”

Derek glowered. “Stiles, you are not going after the alpha! Are you insane?!”

She smirked. “Well I’m helping your sorry ass again, aren’t I? Pretty sure that doesn’t say much for my sanity.” She turned to Cora. “If I can take out the alpha, can the rest of you handle the betas?”

She nodded. “We should be able to. Peter?” she asked, and Stiles turned to look at Peter, who was lingering behind her, watching them.

Peter sighed. “Possibly, but I really think Stiles should stay out of it,” he said pointedly.

Stiles just made a face. “Nobody likes you anyways,” she said, then turned back to Cora. “You talk these two into it and I’ll jump in the books. See what kind of juice I’ve got left-“

“What part of stay out of it don’t you understand, Stiles?” Peter interrupted and Stiles narrowed her eyes at him.

“The part where this involves my dad and you don’t get a say in this,” she argued.

Derek shook his head resolutely. “No, Stiles. You agreed to stop the magic. You _ended_ that. No more after last time. We can handle this.”

Stiles huffed. “I’ll let you handle this alone when you stop treating me like a ‘damsel’ here, Derek,” she said harshly. “Just because I’m a girl doesn’t mean you suddenly get to treat me like one. I’m not a child either-“

“You are _twenty years old_ , you are a child!” he argued. “It’s nothing about your age or your gender, Stiles, it’s about you _nearly dying last time!_ ” he snapped. “Also, this isn’t your fight-“

“My dad unequivocally makes this my fight,” she jumped in. “And I’m sick of this age crap, Derek!” She gestured to herself. “I’ve been _saving your ass_ since I was sixteen years old! You were barely older than I am now when you rolled back into town and yet I’m still a child to you?! I haven’t been a child since long before you knew me, Derek, so get over it!” She shook her head. “Derek, nothing is going to suddenly make me the run-of-the-mill, innocent little kid you seem so determined to stop from ruining and you know it. You never could accept that I was more of a ‘grown up’ than you back then and you’re still trying to treat me like a child now and it’s _so old_!” She looked him in the eyes. “I’m doing this. And I know that you think you’re protecting me by trying to stop me, but as sorry as I am for abandoning my pack because of my own shit, the fact still stands that I lived the past two and a half years without you there to save my ass,” she said harshly. Derek looked at her like she’d slapped him and she felt _terrible_ , but it was what she had to do. She turned to Cora, who looked torn between angry at Stiles and on her side. “I’ll talk to Scott and make sure he tells you whatever I’m planning so they can’t hide it from you,” she said and Cora smirked.

“Thanks for that. You think you’ve got it bad, imagine being Derek’s little sister,” she said and Stiles laughed.

“Trust me, my dad’s the Sheriff, I know how it probably feels,” she said, and then turned to leave without a word, ignoring Derek calling her back.

~

Stiles had just got back from collecting come of her old books from where Deaton had been storing them for her since she had abandoned magic when a certain someone’s black Camaro rolled to a stop and pulled into the driveway behind her. She huffed and grabbed the box of books from her jeep, turning and heading straight through the kitchen door from the garage. “Stiles!” Derek barked and she ignored him, shouldering the door open. “Stiles!” He followed her inside and she groaned, as he came in the door behind her. “You’re not going to do this.”

“Sorry, I can’t hear you!” she said, going to the living room. “Hey Dad, you okay?” she asked, and he looked up from the couch.

“Hey Stiles. Derek,” he said, nodding.

Derek nodded. “Sheriff,” he said, and then reached for the box, growling when Stiles snatched it back. “Give me them.”

“No,” Stiles said simply.

“Stiles! You’re not doing this-“

“I’ll do whatever the hell I want, Hale!” she argued, pushing past him and running up the stairs. 

Derek gritted his teeth as he turned and followed her. “Stiles, stop being difficult and just give me the books.”

She dropped them on her desk and turned to glare at him. “Excuse me, Derek, but what business of yours is it what I do? Why should I stop?”

He narrowed his eyes. “Because I said so.”

Stiles faked a gasp. “Oh no, the big bad alpha told me to do something!” She glared. “Now go away.”

“No,” he said firmly. “This is dangerous, Stiles! If you don’t stop I’ll make you stop.” 

She smirked, crossing her arms. “Oh yeah, you and what army?” she demanded and he made a frustrated sound, throwing his hands up.

“Me and the _teeth in my mouth_!” he snarled, fangs elongating slightly as his eyes flashed red.

Stiles just bared her own teeth at him. “I’ll bite you right back, don’t try me,” she said and he narrowed his eyes, trying his best not to let the flicker of amusement show.

“I’ll tell your dad,” he said in a level tone and she huffed.

“Yeah right, you wouldn’t-“

“Sheriff!” Derek said loudly, turning to walk out. Stiles yelped in shock then ran after him, stumbling on the steps and losing precious seconds that it took for him to get to the living room. “Sheriff, tell her that she has to stop because this is dangerous-“

“YOU SHUT IT!” she cried as she jumped on his back, slapping a hand over his mouth while she dangled, toes barely touching the ground from her spot with one arm around his neck and the other over his mouth. He bit at her hand with his human teeth and she yelped, and then kicked him in the back of the knee, sending them both tumbling to the floor in a pile.

“Stiles, just give me the books-“ 

“No, you ass! Now shut up-“

“I’m going to tell him what you’re up to-“

“DEREK!” she cried, finally disentangling from their half-slap-fight, half ‘get off of me’ shoving match. She got to her feet and purposefully stepped on Derek’s stomach on her way over him, only to cry out when he caught her ankle and tugged, making her fall into the chair beside her while he hopped up inhumanly fast. “You asshole!”

“Don’t step on me then-“

John sighed. “Really mature, you two,” he said and they both stopped, and then looked at him with sheepish looks. 

Derek glanced at Stiles, and then sighed. “I’m just trying to stop her from-“

“YOU CANNOT ‘TELL ON ME’ DEREK!” she cried, jumping up. “I’m an adult! You can’t just go tell my dad and get me in trouble!”

John chuckled and shook his head. “Tell me what, Stiles?”

She huffed and turned back. “It’s nothing, Dad-“

“She’s going to do magic again,” Derek said gravely.

John just paused. “Magic?” he asked and then looked at Stiles. “You do _magic_?!” 

Stiles bit her lip. “I used to. I can still. I’m going to again.”

Derek narrowed his eyes at her. “The last time she did magic was when she got ‘extremely dehydrated and over exhausted’ when she was eighteen,” he said and the Sheriff’s face drained of all color.

“No,” he said simply, looking at Stiles. “No. Hell no-“

“But Dad!” she cried in contempt. “I was over my head, I can handle it-“

“I said _no_ ,” John said firmly. “I watched my child _dying_ for two days until you miraculously started responding to the treatments. I will never survive that again,” he said in a tight voice.

Stiles bit her lip. “But Dad I have to. If I don’t they could all die.”

Derek shook his head. “We’ll find another way, Stiles,” he said seriously. He shook his head. “He isn’t the only one that lost their minds then, Stiles.” She felt guilty as she saw a haunted look cross his features. “Isaac didn’t sleep for a week. Scott didn’t leave the waiting room for three days. Scott’s mother had to take off work because she kept crying, Stiles,” he stressed. “I will not let you do that to them again.” He shook his head. “We’ll find another way, Stiles. Just not this.”

She looked between her father and Derek then sighed. “Guys, I can do this the right way. It’s worth a shot. I could help.”

“I’d rather let them kill me,” John said and Stiles gasped, paling. He looked at Derek, and nodded. “I’d rather let them rip me to pieces than lose you, Stiles.”

She just looked between them before sighing. “I can’t let you die. Either of you. You don’t get this,” she groaned in frustration. “Everything I’ve ever done, it’s because I can’t sit still. I cannot sit by and watch you fail, Derek. You have no chance against them without me,” she stressed.

“We’ll find a way,” he said resolutely. “I can’t-“ He swallowed and looked away. “I can’t risk losing you like that. You’re part of my pack no matter how long you were gone,” he said weakly.

Stiles sighed, but nodded. “Fine,” she said weakly. “Let’s- let’s find a way then.” She shook her head. “But I’m staying involved. I’m protecting my dad. I have to stay in on the plan-“

“Derek,” John interrupted, voice full of alarm. They looked up and he sat, staring at Derek. “How did you get in?” he asked and Stiles and Derek both paled then turned and ran for the front door. They rushed outside and ran following their recently buried ring, only to stop when they found a spot that had been dug up.

Stiles gasped and looked up. “DAD!” she screamed, sprinting back towards the house. Derek turned and kept on her heels as she ran back to the living room, rushing to her father’s side, sitting by him when she realized he was alright. She looked up, gasping. “Derek, check the house!”

Derek rushed upstairs and stopped, sniffing to see if he smelled anything. He didn’t catch any scents that were familiar besides John and Stiles, but the dusty, animal-smelling books in Stiles’s room threw him off a little so he closed his eyes and listened. He heard the gurgling of water in the upstairs bathroom’s pipes. He heard the ticking of two clocks and a watch. He sought out Stiles’s heart easily, and then focused on her father’s. He listened to the creaks and groans of the house, and then then jerked out of it when he focused in on a separate heartbeat coming from downstairs. He leapt down the stairs, flying to the living room. “STILES!” he cried, rushing into the room just in time for Stiles and John’s hearts to spike as the door to John’s study flew open with a crash.

Stiles leapt up with a scream, then immediately tugged her father to his feet and stood in front of him as she faced down the same woman she had cut the night she tried to come in the window. Derek could feel the waves of panic rolling off of Stiles and John so strongly it added to his own panic at having Stiles and her dad between him and an enemy. “Well, well. You’ve got a protective streak,” the woman said, smirking at Stiles. “Here’s a hint: you should’ve gone with the magic,” she said and then, without warning, she lunged for Stiles.

But Derek was faster. His reflexes were sharper than any betas so he was able to collide with her before she could get to Stiles, knocking her to the ground. “Run!” He snarled at Stiles, who helped her father out of the house at a brisk jog, not hesitating to get them out. 

“Oh how we lucked out,” the woman said, circling with Derek around the living room. “We go for the weaker of the humans your pack of mongrels associates with and what do we find? The alpha has a _special_ human who wasn’t around last time,” she cooed. “Disgusting,” she growled. “Not bad enough you bite humans and give them our gift, not bad enough to risk the filthy mutts breeding with a _hunter_ , but you have your own human bitch,” she snarled. “And she isn’t even a _real_ bitch, she’s a twisted, medically altered male human!” She leered. “It’ll be fun ripping her throat out in front of you-“

Derek roared. “You’re never leaving this house,” he thundered before pouncing.

She never even stood a chance.

~

Stiles had taken her father straight to the Hale house where Cora at least was waiting to help her protect him if she had to. Cora called Peter and had him come home. When Peter arrived before Derek came back, she started to get worried. “Should he have at least called by now?” she asked for the fifth time before she got up and started pacing. “God how did we not notice?” She groaned, tugging at her hair. “Derek just followed me in the house and I didn’t even notice anything was wrong. That was so _stupid_ of me,” she groused, walking out into the front hall. She started running up and down the stairs, trying to distract herself but she could hear them talking.

“She is worried, but she’ll be okay,” John said. “She’s still pretty bad at relaxing. She gets stressed really fast when I’m in danger. She blames herself but she’ll be fine.” Stiles rolled her eyes but kept running. “I’m sure Derek’s fine so she will be.”

“Not to be rude, John, but when is she leaving?” Stiles grumbled at Peter’s voice. He still just grated at her nerves purely by existing most days. “If she would just leave already, we could focus better. It’s not that we aren’t happy to see her, but the fact is she’s a distraction for… certain people.”

“Derek’s better than he was,” John said, and Stiles heard Peter’s absence of a response. “What? I’m not blind. When she called and he came running without even getting dressed because she was in danger, I knew he wasn’t over her. I was damn shocked, too. They didn’t talk for two years so I thought he’d get over Stiles. And I’m sorry he’s distracted because of her, but I don’t think any of us want her to leave.”

“We’ll have a better chance at winning and surviving,” Peter countered. “Not to mention she’ll be safe back in San Francisco.”

“She’s too selfless to car about that,” John said, and Stiles smiled, stopping her running at the top of the stairs. “Stiles is a hero. She’s risked her life to save all of you before. She’s not gonna run off when I’ve been attacked and her friends could die.”

“She’s a child, John,” Peter said in what Stiles could only consider a bitchy tone.

“Yeah, but she’s my child. She may be reckless to the point of stupidity, but it’s always because she wants to protect people and I’m not going to discourage that,” John said, and Stiles couldn’t help but smile at the pride in her father’s voice.

She was distracted by the door opening and a bloody Derek staggering inside. “DEREK!” she cried, flying down the stairs. She caught him around the middle when he stumbled, slamming the door behind him by falling against it. “Oh God, Derek-“

“I’m okay, I’m fine,” he said, hanging onto Stiles’s shoulders. The others rushed in, all stopping in the hall behind Stiles as they took in Derek’s blood-soaked form.

“You’re covered in blood, that is not okay!” she cried, looking at his bloody arms and shirt.

He smiled tiredly, leaning his head back against the door. “Most of it’s not mine,” he said, he said, sliding his hands down to Stiles’s forearms. “Sheriff, I have some bad news about your living room,” he said and John cringed visibly.

“I’m getting a picture, Son,” he said grimly.

“Derek, where are you hurt?” Stiles demanded, snapping her fingers in front of Derek’s face.

Derek looked at her and shook his head. “I’ll be healed up in a little bit. She was just a beta.”

“Yeah, well I’ll be the judge of that,” she said, grabbing his wrist. “We’ll be back,” she said, dragging him upstairs.

“Stiles, I’ll be fine-“

“So if I elbow you in that nasty gash in your side you won’t whine like a little bitch?” she countered and Derek winced away when she acted like she was gonna hit him. “Thought so. Now come on.” She led him upstairs, smirking when she could practically feel him rolling his eyes at her. She hesitated, looking both ways. “Where’s your bathroom?” she asked, realizing she’d never been upstairs before.

Derek chuckled and nodded to the left. “This way.” He led her to the room on the back corner of the house and opened the door. She followed him into his bedroom and then through into the bathroom. “I called Alpha privilege and gave myself a bathroom I didn’t have to share,” he admitted and she snorted.

“Of course you did.” She pushed him into the shower stall and he raised an eyebrow at her. “What? You’re gross and bloody. Take off your clothes in there where it’s easier to clean up.

Derek huffed. “I’m not getting naked just to have a wound cleaned.”

“I didn’t say you had to, but it’s easier to clean up all the blood splatter from a shower stall when you strip your shirt off,” she said, then walked over and grabbed his shirt, snatching it up.

“Stiles!” he squawked indignantly, arms getting caught as she snatched it off over his head, dropping it on the floor. He huffed and glared at her, crossing his arms over his chest. “I am an alpha, not a child.”

She gave him a flat look and pointed at his side. “I can see the muscles moving in that gaping wound,” she said, and he looked down and winced. Stiles rolled her eyes and went to the sink, pulling the first aid kit out from under it. “I’ll get you some pants. You rinse off the blood because once I clean that wound we don’t need dirt and blood running in it again.”

When Derek had washed himself off and put on the pants she had laid on the sink, he came out, a hand over his side. “It’s healing pretty fast but it’s still deep,” he admitted begrudgingly. 

Stiles opened the first aid kit and pulled him pointed to the floor in front of her. Derek huffed but stopped, standing in front of Stiles so she could clean his wound. “This might hurt a little,” she warned and Derek huffed.

“I’m not Scott, I can handle a little- Ow ow ow ow that burns!” he cried, whimpering. “Good God, what is that?! Lava on a cloth?!”

Stiles laughed. “It’s just alcohol, you’ve just got what appear to be pieces of fine grained dirt in there so it’s scraping. Plus, ribs are a very sensitive area.” She cringed when he whined. “Sorry, sorry, I’m being gentle,” she said, wiggling her eyebrows up at him.

Derek huffed out a laugh. “You’re an ass,” he said, cringing when she put alcohol on the wound. “This _sucks_. Usually wounds heal before this is necessary.”

She snorted. “Baby,” she mumbled, but slid her other hand over his side soothingly. “I’m nearly done,” she comforted. Derek froze, barely holding in a gasp as Stiles’s fingers skated down his uninjured side, causing goose bumps to come up on his skin. She taped a bandage over his side and patted it. “Done. Shouldn’t be but a few hours before you’re as good as new.”

Stiles stood and closed up the first aid kit, taking the used materials and the kit back to the bathroom. She washed her hands and came out to see Derek pulling on a shirt. “So, ready to talk about what happened?”

Derek shook his head. “They were after you,” he said and Stiles paled. “I don’t want to think about it. I want to just… ignore it all and hope it goes away. But the fact of the matter is that they tricked a human into breaking the line – they would never keep a human with them – and they went after you and your dad.”

Stiles walked over and sat on the bed beside him. “Derek, we can’t let them get my dad.”

“I know.” He sighed, looking up. “I took out one beta. That weakens them. There are five betas and an alpha now.” He looked at her closely. “No magic, but can you help us plan an attack?” he asked. “You were always the brains of the operation, Stiles.”

Stiles smirked. “Why yes, big, bad, alpha man, I think I can offer my assistance if you promise me one thing,” she said and he rolled his eyes. “You listen to me exactly to the detail and everyone has to call me ‘your highness’-“

“Stiles,” Derek droned and she batted her eyelashes.

“I believe you mean ‘your highness’-“

“We’re not calling you ‘your highness’,” Derek said flatly. 

Stiles just grinned and jumped up. “Well it was worth a shot!” She held out her hand. “C’mon, we’ve got planning to do.”

Derek let her help him up and smiled nostalgically. “Just like old times, huh?”

She shrugged. “With the bonus addition of needing someone to go de-gore my house,” she said and Derek made a face.

“I’m going to make Peter do it.” Stiles raised an eyebrow and Derek huffed. “I had to see a goodnight kiss the other night after a date-“

“EW!” Stiles cried, flailing slightly. “I’d rather clean my own house than suffer that-“

“I can hear you both, you know?” Peter called from the floor below them.

Stiles just stomped on the floor pointedly. “I know, you need to understand how disturbing you are!” Derek actually burst out laughing, his heart catching as Stiles shared a wide, beautiful smile with him as they made their way down the stairs.

~

Derek, Stiles, and Cora all hovered over the map and discussed strategy until Scott, Isaac, Allison, and her father made it back. Allison hadn’t been planning a trip home that weekend but she had to help them. They waited for Peter to return from his ‘task’, and when he did return he was clearly unhappy with Derek. Stiles snickered at the sweaty, grumpy face turned towards them as Peter walked in and then collapsed on the couch beside John’s chosen chair. “I hate your child,” he told John, who just smirked.

“That’s my girl,” he said with a wink in Stiles’s direction. Hearing her father’s continued support after only a few weeks of knowing made her happier than she could handle sometimes. As it was, she couldn’t get the stupid smile off of her face at hearing ‘my girl’ from his lips. 

Of course her smile slid off her face and was replaced with a mentally scarred look of horror when Chris leaned over the back of the couch and pecked Peter’s lips before asking, “What happened, Babe?” and officially ruining Stiles’s brain for life.

Derek looked at her face then burst out laughing, startling Cora, who clearly wasn’t used to seeing her brother laugh. “Let me guess, you saw what I heard?” he asked and she nodded, face frozen in disgust. “I’m so seriously sorry,” he said with what could only be called a _giggle_.

“You think it sucks for you? One of them is my dad,” Allison said, cringing as she stepped up beside Stiles, patting her shoulder in sympathy. “My therapy one day will be really expensive.”

Stiles waved a hand in a vague gesture. “You don’t get to talk about therapy to me. Do you _know_ what kind of horrible things I had to put up with in high school because of you?” she asked, ignoring the hurt look on Allison’s face. “Scott gave me _details_ of _things_ I NEVER wanted to know!”

Allison gasped and glared across the room at Scott. “Scott!” she cried and he gave her a sheepish look as Isaac smirked at him.

Derek cringed. “Please God, do not share with the class, Stiles,” he said and she scoffed.

“Like I’m going to ruin your lives the way Scott did mine.” She lowered her voice in a mock-whisper. “Although there was one time she put him in her underwear. That story is _hilarious_ -“

“STILES!” Scott cried, throwing up his arms. “Bro code, dude!”

Stiles rolled her eyes. “Alright, but I didn’t give you the details of losing my virginity, dude, so you still owe me one-“

“Yes, can we please not, thanks?” Derek said, reining them back in. “Death Eater pack, please?” Everybody looked at him and he rolled his eyes. “Stiles got it in my head, don’t judge me,” he huffed.

Stiles took over. “So they attacked me and Dad today,” she said, earning worried looks from those who hadn’t already heard. “Derek was there and he fought the beta that was in the house and let me and Dad escape.” She looked up at Derek and met his eyes as she continued. “I’m not going to do magic,” she said and Derek’s eyes softened gratefully. “I’m sorry, but I can’t do that to you guys again,” she said and Scott nodded as he and Isaac came to join them at the table. “But they’re down a beta. There are five betas and the alpha left,” she pointed out. “It’s a closer match now. With four betas, an alpha, and two hunters, you all got a better shot at taking out the betas.”

“Wait,” Derek looked up. “Why am I not going after the alpha?” he demanded and she took a breath, and then met his eyes.

“Because I am.”

“WHAT?!” John climbed up out of his chair and came over, wincing some when he shoved between Scott and Isaac. “Are you _insane_?!” he demanded. “You’re not going after an alpha werewolf, Stiles-“

“I’m just as good of a shot as ever, Dad,” she said tightly. “With the betas being slaughtered, he’ll be disoriented. I can take the shot and we’re done.”

“You can shoot a gun?” Isaac asked, looking confused. “Am I the only one that is surprised-“

“You can shoot a _handgun_ ,” John argued. “You’re not getting that close, Stiles.”

Chris came over. “Stiles, I can set up with a rifle. I can get the alpha without you risking yourself,” he said and she glared.

“You have to help pick off betas with your rifle. I have a plan and I know what I’m doing,” she said firmly. “Derek, you will call them out. Show up, announce you killed that beta. You draw them into the woods behind the motel and we ambush them.” She looked at Isaac and Scott. “You two will come in from across the street and cut them off from the road so they can’t retreat.” He pointed at Allison and her dad. “You two will be in deer stands in the trees so you can take them out from above. Derek, Peter, you two are our strongest fighters so you’ll dive in and fight with Scott and Isaac. Four wolves and two hunters for five betas is an easy kill-“

“It’s overkill,” Derek argued. “For one – and I honestly don’t mean this with hostility this time – I don’t want bullets and arrows raining down on us in the middle of a fight.” He shot the hunters a look. “You’re good shots, but I don’t trust your aim that well in the dark.”

Chris shook his head. “I’m not firing down on a bunch of werewolves fighting when half the mass of them are this pack, Stiles-“

“You will,” she said firmly. “If you don’t want to really shoot them, fire blanks.” She looked at Cora. “You will be here with my dad. You can protect him if shit goes wrong,” she said and Cora looked annoyed. “The alpha will be seriously confused and disoriented by suddenly having those betas all dying on him. I can sneak into his room and shoot him.”

“No!” Derek said fiercely. “You’re not- Stiles that’s stupid! Chris can take him out through a window with a rifle just as well-“

“HE IS LEADING AN ATTACK ON MY FAMILY!” Stiles shouted at Derek, leaning across the table to get further in his space. “I don’t trust anyone else to do the job, Derek-“

“WELL I DON’T TRUST YOU NOT TO GET YOURSELF KILLED!” Derek snarled back, leaning until he was in her face. “Stiles, I am the leader of this pack. I _will not_ let you do this. What I say is final-“

“Then I’ll go after them _myself_ ,” she hissed, slamming her hands on the table. “I want them _dead_ , Derek!” She stormed away from the table, heading for the hall.

“What?! You think I don’t?” Derek called, following her. “Stiles, stop!” She walked down the hall beside the stairs to the kitchen and he growled, following her. “Stiles, please, calm down and be reasonable. I know going after your dad again was a last straw, but you’re talking a suicide mission!”

Stiles stopped and turned around in the kitchen. “Derek, I know you’ve always thought I can’t fend for myself, but for _once_ can you understand that I need to do this?” 

Derek just stared, eyes wide. “Stiles…no.” She huffed and threw her hands up, but Derek caught her arm, pulling her back. “No, Stiles, not like that-“

“Just let me go, Derek, I need to be alone,” she said firmly, leaving through the back door.

~

Stiles and John were staying at the Hale house that night so when Stiles returned, her dad had already taken up the room they’d kept for her. She got ready for bed but went downstairs to the kitchen to get something to eat and drink first. When she finished eating a pack of pop tarts, she threw them in the trash, arms going up in silent victory when she rung it. She gasped, however, when a chuckle startled her. She spun around and Derek offered her a small smile from the doorway. “Jesus, I’d forgot how creepy you could be,” she grumbled and he rolled his eyes.

“Can we talk?” he asked, and she winced.

“Derek, I’m tired, can’t we argue later?”

“I don’t want to argue,” he urged softly. “I just want to talk. I promise, I won’t fight you.”

Stiles looked at Derek’s wide, pleading eyes and her resolve crumbled. She sighed and nodded. “Alright,” she said, and Derek’s eyes brightened. She chuckled softly. “Those damn eyes,” she muttered, walking past Derek. He fell into step with her and nudged her.

“What about my eyes?” he asked and she smiled, walking backwards into the living room. 

“You have puppy eyes, dude,” she said and he rolled them. “No, seriously, they are so expressive. If you are upset, like then, they get all ‘sad puppy’ and then when you smile they shine bright like a puppy who was praised for something.”

Derek snorted, sitting on the couch beside Stiles. “Only you would compare an _alpha werewolf_ to a puppy.”

She shrugged, pulling her knees up as she looked at Derek. “You know me well enough to know the dog jokes will never end.” She bit her lips, looking away. “That’s probably why you think I can’t handle this, immature jokes like that.”

Derek shook his head. “That’s what I wanted to talk about,” he said, looking her in the eyes. “I never said you’re incapable of handling things. I never said you were weak.” He let out a soft sound and shook his head. “Stiles, you’re the bravest person I know,” he said truthfully. “You’re brave, and you’re stronger than most of us.” He looked into her eyes. “You are a hero, Stiles. You are physical weaker than any of us but you never run and hide. You are a braver and more courageous person than I’ll ever be.” He swallowed hard, brow furrowed. “I don’t think I’ll ever meet anybody who doesn’t need anybody the way you don’t need anybody to protect you.”

She sighed and flopped back against the couch. “Then why are you so against my plan?”

“Because being there and fighting is one thing, but going after an alpha alone is suicide.” He looked at her closely. “Stiles, if I wanted to, I could kill you before you could react. He’s twice as strong as I am, twice as fast, and twice as agile.” He shook his head. “And I’d never hurt you, but he would rip you apart without hesitation. There is bravery and then there is stupidity, Stiles, and that would get you killed.” 

She sighed. “I know,” she admitted, looking up. “Derek, I’m overreacting because it’s my dad. They hurt my dad. He’s the _only_ relative I have. My parents were both only children so I don’t have any cousins or aunts and uncles. My grandparents died years and years ago. He is the only family I have, Derek. I _can’t_ lose him.” She rolled her eyes. “So I admit, I get a little crazy about him. Like planning to gun down an alpha werewolf alone,” she grumbled.

Derek chuckled. “Trust me, Stiles, I know how much he means to you. I’ve always known that you would go to the ends of extreme to protect him.” He shook his head slowly. “But I won’t let you do this, Stiles. I can’t and won’t lose you like that.” He groaned, putting his head in his hands. “You can’t even imagine what it would do to me.”

Stiles looked down at her toes, resting her chin on her knees. “I’ve got a pretty good idea. You almost died on me twice in the past. I thought you _were_ dead the last time.” She cringed. “Why do you think I was able to force that magic too far? I thought you were dead and I had to kill that nymph no matter what it took.”

Derek looked up, eyes wide. “You- you nearly dying was my fault?” he asked weakly and she groaned.

“Derek what? No!” She huffed and glared at him. “How do you always find a way to blame yourself?” She couldn’t understand why Derek was _always_ blaming himself. He tried to make everything that went wrong his fault and it drove her _crazy_.

“Stiles, you just said it was my fault-“

Stiles threw her hands up. “The man I fell in love with at sixteen years old was _dead_ and I was hurting and I wanted to hurt the thing that killed him! What I did, and what it almost did to me, was all my fault. Me. I make my own decisions and my own mistakes.” She glared at him. “Stop taking on the burden of blame for everybody else.” Derek stared at her in shock and she frowned. “Derek?”

He opened and closed his mouth a few times before speaking. “You- you loved me?” he asked in a pained voice.

Stiles paled. “Oh _shit_.” She stood and turned to leave, but Derek jumped up, catching her wrist. 

“No, don’t- don’t leave.” She deflated but didn’t turn back to face him. Derek’s hand didn’t leave her wrist, though his grip slackened. “Stiles… I didn’t know.”

She closed her eyes and shook her head. “I was too young. I knew that. I needed to be in on everything so I pushed it down. We weren’t even friends when I fell in love, and I needed to be part of the pack to help everybody. If I had made things weird, I’d have never been able to help and you all needed me.” Derek made a soft, hurt sound and she swallowed hard, twisting her wrist in his hand to slide their fingers together, squeezing. He stepped a tiny bit closer and rested his forehead against the back of her head. “I don’t regret not telling you,” she said softly, clinging to his hand when he held his breath. “If I had known that you felt the same-“ She felt his pulse pick up in his hand and she stroked her thumb across his knuckles. “I’d have never left Beacon Hills. I would have stayed for you and I wouldn’t have been brave enough to take the opportunity to become who I really was.” She swallowed hard. “I needed the past two and a half years to become who I am and I would’ve never had that if I had known you loved me back. But it doesn’t mean I don’t regret breaking your heart, Derek.”

Derek let out a broken laugh, the puff of breath against her neck sending a shiver down her spine. “I thought you were just attracted to me. I thought- I thought if I didn’t say anything it would stop. But then you left and everything in me wanted to go after you,” he admitted in a tone that made Stiles’s insides twist. “I was going to tell you when you came home, but you didn’t and when I realized you were really gone, when I realized I had lost you…” He squeezed her hand. “I fell apart. God, Stiles, I spent months just drifting. I didn’t want to eat, I couldn’t sleep. I just hated myself for what I had done by hesitating.” He let out a shaky breath and pressed closer. “And then- And then you came back.” 

Stiles caught his other hand and pulled his arms around her, tears burning her eyes as she leaned back against Derek. He hesitated, but then tightened his arms around her middle, tucking his face into her neck. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know coming home would mess things up for you, Derek.” She leaned into his broad chest behind her. “I didn’t know you had ever loved me, so I didn’t know that coming back would set you back.”

He laughed weakly. “I didn’t know I wasn’t over you either, so it’s not your fault.” He rested his lips against her shoulder before turning his head to speak. “But the second I caught your scent that day you came to the house, everything just- it hit me.” He closed his eyes. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry if this makes things harder for you.”

Stiles shushed him, closing her eyes as she held on tight. “Everything will be okay, Derek, I promise,” she whispered, stroking a hand along his wrist. Derek relaxed some, though he didn’t let go of her for anything.

~

When Stiles woke up, she was confused for a split second before realizing that the heavy weight on her chest was Derek’s head. She remembered sitting back on the couch with Derek, neither of them talking as they just held hands and thought. At some point, they must’ve fallen asleep and found their way horizontal on the couch. Stiles kissed Derek’s forehead and then carefully removed the arm around her waist so that she could get up. She left Derek sprawled on his stomach and couldn’t help the way her heart warmed at the sight of him so peaceful. 

She headed upstairs to check on her dad and get changed into the clothes Peter had brought home for them and found him already in the shower. She changed and headed back downstairs, yawning as she wandered into the kitchen. She tried not to tense when she saw Derek leaning on the counter, talking to Isaac where Isaac sat drinking coffee with Chris and Scott. Peter was cooking breakfast, much to Stiles’s surprise. She didn’t say anything as she opened the refrigerator and got a bottle of water so that she could take her pills. “You still take ADHD meds?” Scott asked, catching her attention.

She nodded, swallowing. “Yep. I asked about stopping them but my doctor said that if I stopped them, chances of depression are too high. Like, fifty percent of transgender people attempt suicide, so making sure I stay un-depressed is a big deal. And they don’t mess with my hormones so I’m still on them.” She snickered, walking over to hop onto the counter beside Scott since there were only three stools. “Another year and I get to swap to just taking birth control in high doses to get my hormones. How funny is that, dude? Nothing is more ‘college girl’ than having birth control pills in your medicine cabinet.”

“What makes that even funnier is what I found in the living room this morning,” Peter said, turning to wave his spatula at her. “Somebody is living up to the ‘horny college girl’ stereotype. Even if _somebody_ agreed to ‘no sex in the house’,” he sing-songed.

Stiles gaped. “There is no truth to anything you are saying you asshat,” she squeaked, cheeks bright red.

Scott growled at Peter. “I think we all know who was having sex in the house last night, and it sure wasn’t going on downstairs,” he said and Stiles made a horrified face when Chris choked on his coffee on the other side of Isaac. 

Stiles made a face and Scott nodded up at her with a mentally scarred expression. “Ewwww, I’ve never been happier to be a human!”

“I’ve never been more jealous of a human,” Cora said as she walked in, going to the refrigerator. “I’m shocked Derek didn’t wake up and go bang on the door or something,” she said and Stiles looked away quickly.

“I didn’t hear Derek come up last night,” Isaac mentioned and Derek pointedly started making toast so his back was to the room.

“Has anybody seen Stiles?” John called from the hall, only to come in and smile. “There you are. I didn’t even wake up when you came up last night or when you got up this morning.”

Peter chuckled. “Somebody will do the math in a second,” he said in a low, teasing tone.

Chris sighed. “Tact, Peter,” he droned and Cora shot Stiles a dark look.

“Wait, if you didn’t go to bed last night, and Derek didn’t go to bed last night, what were you doing?” she asked and several people stilled.

Stiles glared at her. “Clearly nowhere you’re thinking-“

“We came up with a new plan,” Derek said, coming over to hand Stiles a plate with toast on it. “Your meds used to make you sick if you didn’t eat, so I figured it couldn’t hurt.”

She smiled nervously but thanked him. “Yeah,” she said to Cora. “Let Derek tell you the new plan while I eat. Someone wanna go get Allison?” he asked, and Scott hopped up to go get her. Stiles took his bar stool and bit into the toast.

Derek nodded. “Stiles was talked out of her suicidal plan,” he said and she rolled her eyes. “I’m still going to anger the betas and lead them into the woods. Scott and Isaac are still going to come from behind. Peter will still be waiting and we can take out the five betas. But the plan changes. Allison is going to cover Stiles while she makes a line of mountain ash around the alpha’s hotel room door. With him trapped, he can’t get out without going through the window. Chris will be on the roof of the diner across the street with a rifle and he can take him out when he opens the curtains to break through the window.”

Chris nodded. “What if he breaks through before I can get a shot?”

Derek nodded to Stiles. “Allison will be in the parking lot with her. They can fend for themselves long enough for you to reload. And if there’s a problem getting the shot with them fighting, it can at least keep him occupied long enough for us to get there. He may be stronger than me, but once his betas are all dead, I can take him alone so a few of us can take him easy.” He looked at Cora. “You’re still here protecting John. If anything goes wrong and one of them is able to break for it and try to get to him, you need to keep him safe or get him out.”

“Better plan than the first one,” Allison said from the doorway. She smiled at Stiles. “We like you alive, sorry.”

Stiles waved a hand. “I can admit I was being irrational. I was just really upset.” She shrugged with a small smile. “It’s my dad, you know? He’s all I’ve got.”

Allison put a hand on her shoulder and shared a sad smile. “I know what you mean,” she said softly. “It’s okay, everybody gets a little crazy when they’re worried about their family.”

Peter huffed, turning around to put a plate of pancakes in front of both Chris and Isaac. “So that’s all you two did during the night, huh?” he asked skeptically and Stiles glared.

“Okay look we fell _asleep_ , Peter. You’re an asshole,” she said firmly. “What should you care anyways if you were doing things I never wanted to think about in my life with your sugar daddy?” she said and Derek barely bit back a laugh, covering it with a cough.

John just rolled his eyes at her. “Stiles, was that necessary-“

“Oh you missed him being a jerk to her earlier, it’s justified,” Scott defended. 

Derek rolled his eyes. “Can we please not?” he asked, looking pained.

“Okay, I’m with Derek, moving on to a timeline for the plan?” John requested.

Scott slung his arm around Stiles and sighed. “Don’t worry, we can plot Peter’s ultimate demise later on,” he told her and she laughed, patting his back.

“I knew I kept you around for a reason, buddy.”

~

Stiles fidgeted in the car with Allison, waiting for the right moment to text Derek the ‘go’ signal. They were parked outside the diner low in the seats so the car looked empty, Scott and Isaac were inside drinking coffee as if it was just another night out. Peter was in the woods waiting for Derek to drive up to the hotel, go knock on the door of the room the betas were staying in, and leg it. It was almost too simple of a plan and Stiles was terrified something might go wrong. They had to wait until Chris texted them after calling the motel pretending to need a room number to deliver a pizza.

“You seem nervous,” Allison mumbled and Stiles bit her lip. 

“It seems too easy.” She closed her eyes and leaned back. “It’s never this easy. This is going to suck.” She rubbed her hands over her face. “I just have that feeling like things won’t go right.”

Allison offered her a smile. “Stiles, things should go to plan. It does happen.” She shrugged. “Besides, I get a pretty rough feeling every time things have even the slightest chance of going bad. First time these werewolves came through I felt pretty sick with worry, really. I was so sure Scott was going to get hurt or my dad would.”

Stiles whimpered, tapping at the window. “The last time I felt this way, I woke up with my dad relieved I wasn’t going to die and I swore off magic for good,” she said and Allison looked over with fear in her eyes.

“Stiles… that isn’t going to happen,” she promised. “You’re not gonna do magic. We’ll be okay.”

She shrugged. “I wasn’t the only one who nearly died that day.”

“Nobody will die,” Allison said, patting Stiles’s knee. “We’ll pull this off.”

Stiles nodded, catching her hand to squeeze it once. “I sure hope so. And hey, if nothing else, neither of us have to worry about our dads. That’s a relief.”

Allison nodded. “Definitely.”

They were interrupted by the trill of Allison’s phone and she quickly read off the text. “They’re in rooms two-ten, and two-eleven. So upstairs. Better shot for Dad, but a riskier run for you,” she said, and Stiles cringed, looking at the rickety stairs across from them.

“Yep, that’ll suck,” she said, then grabbed her phone.

_Showtime. Rooms two-ten and two-eleven. Derek, make your run. Everybody else be ready. You get two minutes before I go for the Alpha. Starting now._

Allison started her stopwatch and nodded to Derek leaving his car. “Here we go.” 

They watched Derek run up to the doors and knock on them before leaping over the rail and landing on the car below just as all five betas ran out of the two rooms. Derek waved at them, and then ran around the side of the building. Stiles tapped at the bag of mountain ash between her knees, only to gasp when a sixth person came out of one of the rooms and paused. “SHIT!” she cried, grabbing Allison’s phone. She hit speed-dial for Chris as Allison watched Scott and Isaac rush out of the diner.

“Stiles, two minutes aren’t-“

“THAT’S THE ALPHA! GET HIM!” she cried, only to curse when the Alpha leapt over the rail and ran around the building as well. “New plan, just go now!” she said, then threw the phone back at Allison as she scrambled out of the car just in time to see Scott and Isaac chasing the Alpha into the woods.

“Stiles!” She looked up and Allison tossed her a gun over the roof of the car, strapping her quiver on her back and grabbing her compound out of the back seat. Stiles held the gun in one hand and the mountain ash in the other as they took off towards the woods. “What’s the plan here?” Allison asked as they waited for a car to pass before rushing across the street.

“We get as close as we can without being attacked and I’m going to make a mountain ash circle around us. You just shoot. Don’t let anybody stop me or we’re both dead.” Stiles said, shoving the gun in the waist of her pants. 

The sound of fighting werewolves was awful. Stiles didn’t stop to look when they got close enough, just opened the bag as soon as Allison drew the first arrow. Stiles got most of the way around the circle before one of the betas left her fight to run for them. Allison took her down with an arrow right over Stiles’s head as she rushed to finish the circle. They had been spotted and Stiles heard Scott shout, “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” but was distracted by the sight of Chris running towards them, rifle on his back and a handgun drawn.

“Here!” she cried, and he ducked a pouncing beta just as he stepped over the line, rolling onto his knees to watch the wolf bounce off of the barrier. He stood and they were all back to back, looking mostly in front of Allison for the fight. “Sorry it’s small, we had to be fast,” Stiles said, and Chris just waved a hand.

“It’s alright, none of us are going to stumble out at least.” He pulled a handgun and held it to Stiles, who just pulled her own. 

“I’m good,” she said, then was jerked back when Allison gasped and a pained whine filled the air. Scott looked back to see Isaac crumple to the ground, knee ripped up by the beta attacking him. Stiles didn’t hesitate, aiming and taking the shot the second Scott ducked out of the way. The beta yelped and fell where he stood, howling a choked off sound before going completely limp. It appeared to be the first kill shot, since Allison’s arrows weren’t quite as fast as a bullet and had mostly been arms or legs with the dodging. 

“Down!” Chris snapped and Allison and Stiles both dropped as he spun his gun and pulled off two quick shots, taking down two betas advancing on Scott. 

With three of his betas dead, the alpha’s loud howl echoed through the woods, pulsing to Stiles’s very bones. The next sound they heard was even more terrifying. “DEREK!” Isaac cried, trying to struggle out of where Scott was trying to pull him out of the fray to heal. They followed the way Isaac and Scott were facing to see Derek fall to his knees as both the alpha and a beta slashed at him across the back.

Allison raised her bow and pointed the opposite direction. “Peter, DOWN!” she ordered and Stiles looked around just in time to see Peter hit the ground right as an arrow skimmed over his head and buried itself in the eye socket of the beta he had been fighting. Peter scrambled to his feet and rushed towards Derek. Scott left Isaac’s side and ran to help him, both of them tackling the alpha, rolling away while Derek struggled to crawl away from the remaining beta.

“I can’t get a shot,” Allison said, trying to move around the tree in their way. Chris tried to lean around with his gun, but neither of them could get their weapons aimed. 

Stiles looked down at the line of ash, then at the fights, and made a decision. “I will,” she said, running out of their circle.

“Stiles!” Allison cried before her father could stop her and Stiles stopped as the beta turned from Derek as he crawled away and started towards Stiles. 

Stiles didn’t hesitate to raise her gun and fire, stopping it with a bullet right between the eyes. The angry roar to her right had her turning, only to have no time to even fire as the alpha threw Scott and Peter away and barreled towards Stiles. The alpha caught her in the side and threw her towards a tree with one swipe of his claws. She hit the tree with a hard thud and an ‘oof’ before crumpling to the ground.

Allison and Chris both fired at the alpha, but he was fast enough to dodge the bullets until he was behind a tree. He advanced on Stiles where she laid whining and barely conscious. Stiles blinked at the advancing alpha fearfully, only to have the alpha stop when a loud roar sounded from behind them. Stiles couldn’t turn her head without a wave of nausea, but she knew that roar anywhere. Derek barreled into the alpha, snapping and biting as he went into his full alpha form. Stiles got to her knees and crawled weakly towards Scott and Peter, passing a still recovering Isaac as he watched in horror. She held her bleeding side and faltered just as she reached Scott. 

She couldn’t wake him, but his pulse was strong. She saw Peter already starting to move so she kicked out, waking him with a foot to the hip. “Scott,” she gasped, shaking him. “Scott, you gotta wake up. Derek- Derek needs you.”

“I can’t shoot without hitting Derek!” Chris shouted and Stiles looked up, seeing them looking at her. “You make the call,” he called out and she looked at Derek and the alpha rolling and fighting in such a blur it made her head spin.

She shook her head. “Don’t- don’t shoot him,” she called weakly, her side screaming as she yelled. She figured there wasn’t anything broken, just gashes that were throbbing with every deep breath. She gritted her teeth and groaned against the pain, punched Scott in the arm hard enough to startle him awake.

“Stiles?” he groaned, then froze when he smelled her blood. “STILES-“

“Fine, fine, I’m fine,” she grunted, then reached out to weakly kick at Peter, who was still writing in pain. “One of you has to be able to help him, he’ll die,” she pleaded, but Peter didn’t seem to hear as he gripped his chest and gasped, yanking up handfuls of grass as he writhed in pain. 

Scott shook his head. “Back,” he gasped, trying to move his body. He whimpered, and then glanced over at Peter. “Oh look, Peter’s dying,” he said and Stiles choked on a chuckle before planting a hand.

“I really didn’t want to do this,” she choked out, forcing herself up onto her feet. She let out a pained whine as she staggered before balancing. She clutched at her bleeding side and staggered forward a few feet, raising her empty hand. “I’m sorry,” she whispered, and then closed her eyes.

“STILES!”

“NO, DON’T”

“What is she-“

“She’s too-“

“STILES!”

Stiles opened her eyes and whispered a few words as she twisted the ring on her finger and suddenly a blinding white light filled the forest in a shockwave of heat. There was a howl of pain from what she prayed to everything sacred was the alpha and not Derek, and then just as suddenly the light was gone and Stiles crumpled to her knees.

“Stiles!” She opened her eyes just in time to see Chris and Allison abandon the protected circle and rush for them. 

“Careful!” she choked out. “Not- not dead!”

Chris stopped and turned to the alpha that lay ten feet from Derek, both of them unmoving, and didn’t hesitate to let off four rounds straight into the body. “Now he is,” he said gravely as Allison ran to Stiles.

Stiles shook her head, panting. “Scott- Scott’s back is healing. Worry about him,” she said, waving a hand. “And Peter. Think he might actually be dying. Yay,” she joked painfully, shoving Allison weakly towards them.

“Isaac?” Scott called out.

“I’m fine!” Isaac came limping from the bushes, using a stick to walk. “It’s healing,” he said, hobbling over before falling down beside Scott.

Stiles looked over and saw Chris and Allison tending to Peter, who was still clutching his chest and writing – probably broken sternum if his trouble breathing was anything to go by – and Stiles turned to look for Derek, expecting him to have woken up, only to see him still lying exactly where he’d fallen. Her heart stopped. “Derek?” she called, only to struggle to her feet again when he didn’t even move. She stumbled over, falling and crawling a few feet before finding her footing three times before finally collapsing beside him. “Derek?!” She shook him, rolling him onto his back, only to gasp when she found him not breathing. “DEREK?!” she cried, reaching out to feel of his pulse, horrified to find it far too fast and weak. “No, no, no!” She felt over his chest, looking for worse injuries than the slowly healing cuts on it, only to find none. 

“Stiles? What’s wrong with him?” Isaac called, scrambling over, but Stiles just kept muttering.

“No you don’t, you bastard,” she growled, pulling him into her arms. “Derek, wake up,” she pleaded, shaking him. “Don’t you do this to me!” She turned his head and held his cheek, stroking at his jaw. “Derek, please, please don’t,” she cried weakly, shoving at him. “You don’t get to do this, not again. Not again,” she whimpered. “HEAL DAMN IT!” she cried, hitting him in the chest.

“Why isn’t he healing?!” Isaac asked, and Stiles let out a pained wail.

“You can’t do this!” she sobbed, fingers catching on Derek’s lip. “Don’t leave me, Derek, please,” she gasped out, pressing her lips to his face. “I love you, you asshole, so don’t you dare leave me.” She shook him. “Derek, stop it!”

“Stiles,” Isaac said weakly, putting a hand on her shoulder. “Stiles he’s- his heart is slowing. I’m so sorry,” he breathed and she shoved his hand off.

“No!” she wailed, tears streaming down her face as she rocked Derek. “No you’re going to breathe for me, Derek,” she commanded, touching his neck and chest. “Breathe, do it, I know you can.” She cursed and hit his chest. “I know you can breathe, I know you can, I know you can, I know you CAN!” She slapped him _hard_ right across the face violently as she let out a broken screech of agony. Derek suddenly gasped, startling Isaac so bad he fell over. Stiles choked on her cries and gasped. “Derek?!” His chest heaved as he began to shift, eyes fluttering. “Derek, you’re alive!” Stiles breathed, clutching at his shirt.

Isaac just stared. “It- the suddenly blow must’ve kick started the healing process,” he breathed in wonder.

Derek’s eyes opened and he groaned. “ _Ow_ why does my face sting?” he groaned, blinking up at Stiles. “Stiles?” He froze. “Stiles! You’re bleeding-“ 

Stile shut Derek up with a kiss, holding his face in her hands as she kissed him so hard their teeth clacked painfully but she didn’t _care_. When she finally broke the kiss, gasping for air, she shoved him out of her lap. “You bastard, you _bastard_ ,” she choked out hoarsely. “You do not _get_ to die on me, you complete _bastard_!” she groaned. “I swear to God, Derek, if you try to die on me one more time I’ll lock you in a room full of bubble wrap,” she threatened, leaning her head against his chest. “Oh God, you’re okay.”

Derek forced himself to sit up, cringing, only to ignore the pain so he could wrap an arm around Stiles, holding her to his chest. “It’s okay, I’m fine, you’re the one that’s hurt-“

“You were dying,” Isaac said tightly, hand on Stiles’s back. “You- your heart had nearly stopped.”

“Swear to God, Derek Hale, if you die on me one more time, I’ll kill myself just so I can kick your _ass_ in the afterlife,” Stiles threatened, lifting her head. She looked at his face, greedily taking in everything she almost lost. “God, Derek, I love you so much,” she choked out, letting her head drop as tears streaked her dirty cheeks once more. “Please, please don’t die, please,” she cried against his chest.

“Stiles, it’s okay,” Derek whispered, wrapping his arms around her. “Shhh, just calm down,” he said, falling back on one elbow as he held her with his free arm. 

Stiles groaned, lifting herself away from Derek. “I hate you for doing this to me twice, just so you know,” she said weakly, looking up at Derek’s face. “Fair warning, I’m probably about to pass out,” she whispered and Derek sat up quickly.

“Stiles?” He caught her when she started to fold over, falling across his lap. “Stiles?!” He forced himself up and laid her on the ground, He pulled her shirt up and saw how much she was bleeding. “That isn’t enough to make her-“

“She did magic,” Isaac said and Derek looked up, eyes wide. “She’s what knocked you and the alpha out.”

Derek cursed and struggled to stand. He pulled Stiles into his arms and forced himself to his feet. He was still weak and bleeding heavily, but Stiles was the one who needed help. “Allison!” he called when he saw that she and her father were the only ones not injured. 

Allison ran over. “Stiles?!” she cried, touching Stiles’s face. “She’s burning up.”

Derek nodded. “Hospital. Get her there.” He looked up. “Chris! Help us!”

Chris left where he was helping Scott to his feet and ran over. “Is she alright?” he asked when he got there. “That was too much for her injuries,” he said, taking Stiles as Derek shifted her to his arms. Chris was barely strong enough to hold her but Allison helped out, putting her hands under Stile’s back to take some of the weight.

“The ring,” Allison said, and Derek caught Stiles’s hand, looking at the silver ring around her index finger. “She twisted it. She must’ve been hiding it just in case she needed the power,” she said, and Derek dropped her hand.

“Take her to the hospital. Hurry,” Derek said, watching them carry Stiles away before staggering over to Scott and Peter with Isaac’s help. “Are you two okay?” he asked, falling to his knees between them.

Scott nodded, and then cringed. “Although Peter’s gonna make it, so I could be better,” he joked and Peter laughed.

“Sorry, Scott, you’ll have to wait a little longer to be rid of me,” he joked, reaching over to grab Scott’s shoulder as he lay on his back, still healing. Derek just laughed as he leaned on Isaac, still extremely weak.

~

Stiles was going to be fine, but it took a lot of convincing at the hospital. Having the Sheriff’s kid come in slashed up after the Sheriff himself had been ‘attacked by a thug with a box cutter’ was hard to explain away. Chris convinced them that Allison and Stiles had been riding ATVs and crashed into a fence line. Stiles had a minor concussion and needed the cuts on her side bandaged, but not stitched. After a few hours to make sure she didn’t have a worse head injury, she was free to go. 

It was nearly dawn when they got back to the Hale house, but John was awake in the room he and Stiles were sharing. When she collapsed on the bed, he just curled up beside her, holding her face in his hand as he watched his child sleep, more relieved than he had been in a long time to see that she was alright. He had only just fallen asleep when Stiles woke up. It was only about eight in the morning, but Stiles wanted to take her meds and some painkillers for her head. When she got downstairs, she yawned and stumbled towards the kitchen, still half asleep. She found there was already coffee made and thanked whoever had gotten up early (probably Cora, she figured) and greedily got a cup. She wasn’t really a coffee person, it didn’t go well with ADHD, but she really couldn’t bother to care. She found a pop tart to eat with her medication and then took her coffee and walked out on the front porch. She sat down on the side of the porch and leaned against one of the posts, eyes shut in the cool morning air. 

She didn’t hear the door opening, so she startled when the boards shook from feet shuffling towards her. She gasped and looked around, only to freeze when she saw it was just Derek. He smiled at her and sat down on the other side of her, putting his back to the post behind him. “Are you okay?” he asked and she nodded.

“Yeah, I’m fine, what about you?” She slid her foot out, kicking the outside of his leg. “You were bleeding a lot.” She glowered. “And you tried to die again.”

Derek huffed, rolling his eyes. “Oh that’s rich coming from you! You said you wouldn’t do magic-“

“You were gonna die!” she argued, standing up. “Urgh! I save your ass and you’re still complaining!”

Derek jumped up and followed her. “I’m complaining cause you could’ve DIED! That was way too much power!”

Stiles turned around, holding up her hand. “I got Deaton to give me an object of power just for that reason! I knew I’d end up having to cover your ass!”

Derek growled. “You are so fucking stubborn!”

Stiles gasped. “ _I’m_ stubborn?!” she demanded, sloshing coffee down her hand, only to yelp and drop the cup. Derek walked over and she swatted him off, shaking her hand off as she watched the coffee running across the porch with a disgruntled pout. She wiped her hand off on her borrowed tee-shirt, earning a cleared throat from Derek. “What?” she asked and he sighed.

“That was my shirt you just got coffee all over,” he said and she glanced down, then smirked as she tugged the shirt off and dropped it in the puddle of coffee. Derek just gaped at her.

Stiles gave a smug sigh. “Fair trade for you being an ass already this early,” she said and Derek threw his hands up in frustration.

“YOU NEARLY DIED!” he cried, tugging at his own hair. “God, Stiles, you can’t do anything without being defensive-“

“You would have _died_ if I hadn’t helped you!” she argued, stomping up to him. She poked him in the chest. “I am the reason that alpha is dead, Derek. You were losing because you were hurt and if I hadn’t left the safe-zone to shoot the beta you would’ve been killed by it before the alpha was even the last one standing.”

Derek’s face grew stormy. “ _You left the safe-zone_?!”

Stiles stood tall, crossing her arms. “Yes, yes I did, and you know what?! You didn’t notice because you were _about to die_!” she argued. “I had to get out of the circle to take the shot and I had to do the magic or you would’ve DIED!”

Derek grabbed her by the arms and pulled her close. “Why would you do that?! Why would you run in the middle of a werewolf fight?! ARE YOU INSANE?!” he asked, shaking her some.

“YOU KNOW WHY I DID IT!” she shouted, shoving him away, rubbing at her shoulder. “Jesus, Derek, you were lucid, you saw me fucking break down because I thought you were dying! I had to slap the shit out of you to kick-stark your healing! You don’t get to call me crazy, Derek,” she said, shoving him again, eyes a little wild. 

“Stiles,” he tried, but she just shoved him again.

“Do _not_ start that crap again, Derek, I swear to God-“

“Stiles, I-“

Stiles cut him off by grabbing his shirt and hauling him back to her, kissing him to shut him up. Derek grunted in confusion, and Stiles pulled back and narrowed her eyes. “If you say another word, I will punch you,” she warned, then smirked and kissed him again. 

Derek made an amused sound but didn’t hesitate, curling his hands around Stiles’s waist as he kissed back. Stiles growled and fisted her hand in his hair, the other scrabbling at the sleeve of his shirt. Derek whimpered at the overwhelming feeling of Stiles biting his top lip and then licking it apologetically. When Stiles pulled away to breathe, Derek leaned his forehead against hers. “Stiles, wait, I can’t,” he whispered, holding her face in his hand. He looked into those eyes, burning like amber flames, and swallowed hard. “You’re leaving,” he said tightly, looking down. “You’re leaving and I just- I can’t.”

Stiles bit her lip and grinned. “Fun fact: I told my dad I’m considering transferring local because after being gone for so long and coming back, I don’t want to leave him again.”

Derek looked up, pulling back in surprise. “Stiles, you can’t leave Berkeley! What about your future-“

“Derek, I’m transgender and studying early childhood education.” She shook her head sadly. “I’m not going to be a teacher, Derek. It’ll never happen.” She shrugged. “If I’m lucky, I can work at a daycare center somewhere. Either way, I don’t need a Berkeley education to be a nanny,” she said seriously. “Berkeley was good for me. It was a great experience and it made me strong enough to be myself.” She shook her head, nodding at the house. “But my dad… he’s my family. Scott’s my best friend.” She stepped closer, taking Derek’s face in her hands. “And I love you.”

Derek closed his eyes, leaning in to knock his forehead against Stiles’s. “You didn’t see me for over two years. You used to love me.”

Stiles smiled, scraping her nails down his jaw. “You said it yourself. Two years didn’t stop you from loving me. The second I saw you it was like I’d never left because if there are two truths about you from my perspective, Derek Hale, it’s that you are undoubtedly the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen, and I never stopped loving you after I fell in love at sixteen,” she said, smiling warmly. “Whether you want me or not, Derek, I’m going back long enough to get all my stuff and move home, and then I’m staying in Beacon Hills. It would just be a lot better to know I have you, too.”

Derek let out a sigh of relief and nodded. “I love you, Stiles,” he breathed, before kissing her sweetly, pulling her close, arms around her middle. Stiles laughed when he moved and pressed his face into her neck, nuzzling and breathing her in.

Stiles kissed his hair, holding Derek close for a moment. “I’m glad everybody is okay,” she mumbled and Derek nodded against her throat. “I’m even a little relieved Peter didn’t actually die,” she admitted.

Derek chuckled, and then lifted his head, nodding at the window they were in front of. “You won’t be when he shows everybody the picture of you in just a bra and sweatpants he just took.”

Stiles gaped and turned to the window to see Peter waving his phone with a smirk. She turned back to Derek and shoved him. “You asshole! You didn’t say anything?!” she shoved a hand in his face when he laughed and then turned to run for the door. “GIMME THAT PHONE, PETER!” she shouted as she ran into the house. Derek just stood listening to the bangs and yelps of Stiles trying to catch Peter, and then picked up the dirty shirt and empty coffee mug, a smile fixed on his lips.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [two and a half years](https://archiveofourown.org/works/1688984) by [AlphaFeels](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlphaFeels/pseuds/AlphaFeels)
  * [Yes, I’m a transwoman](https://archiveofourown.org/works/2097138) by [silentsilver2267](https://archiveofourown.org/users/silentsilver2267/pseuds/silentsilver2267)




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